I'm Fine

Part 3: Chapter 55

⚠️⚠️⚠️Trigger warning ⚠️⚠️⚠️ If you get easily triggered by acts of self harm, PLEASE skip this chapter or skip down to the author's note at the very end. I apologize if this chapter is kinda heavy. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!
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A couple of days later...

"Would you like to speak to my mom? She asks about you everyday," Robyn spoke up from across the room. Asha shook her head no.

"Well, do you want to walk around instead? It'll be good for you to get out of this room and stretch your legs."

"Why? It's not like I can leave the house," Asha said.

"I know, but—"

"I'm not really in the mood Robyn, maybe later," Asha whispered as she turned on her stomach. Asha wasn't trying to be rude, but her tone probably came off as such. Robyn only nodded in response, the silence thick as she contemplated what else to say. She didn't know if it was wise to keep prodding Asha or if she should just leave her alone for awhile. Choosing the latter, Robyn turned to leave.

"Okay, I'll go but I'm leaving the door open. Briana just got out the shower."

Asha said nothing as Robyn left. She then closed her eyes and tried to get some sleep despite it only being midday. Asha did her best not to trigger any more bad dreams. Instead, she thought of some of her favorite moments with her daughter. For instance, when Imani took her first steps, or when she said her first word. Asha also thought about Imani's birthday when she went skating for the first time earlier this year, and also when they went to the indoor jungle gym. All of these events were the epitome of Asha's happiness. But now that Imani was gone, Asha feared that all of those memories were essentially the only things that she had left of Imani.

"No," she muttered half asleep.

"O-Only happy thoughts," she shook herself awake almost instantly. She then peeled the covers from off her body and sat near the edge of the bed. She couldn't do this anymore. This shit was killing her. Asha got up and threw on some sweatpants, a hoodie, and a pair of tennis shoes. She then stormed downstairs, heading straight for the front door.

"Asha?"

She ignored Robyn. Her only concern was getting the hell out of there.

"Asha!" Briana ran up after her. "What are you doing?"

Asha then stopped, realizing that she had no means of transportation. So, she turned on her heels and headed for the garage. She yanked the door open and turned the lights on. Dashawn's Rolls-Royce sat in the same spot as always. It was supposed to be her car, but she could never bring herself to take it. She scanned the room, ignoring the odd feeling that she got from being so close to it.

"Asha, talk to me," Briana said stepping into the garage for the first time.

"There's nothing to say. I'm leaving."

"But, you're here for a reason. I don't think you should leave," Robyn quickly appeared from around the corner, trying to catch her breath.

"I can't stay here for another second while my baby is out there somewhere. If she's dead or alive I need to find her. She should have a proper burial," Asha mumbled, getting even more upset.