𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒐𝒍𝒇 𝒔𝒖𝒓𝒗𝒊𝒗𝒆𝒔 ➪ «𝑑𝑎𝑟𝑦𝑙 𝑑𝑖𝑥𝑜𝑛»

ch. LVII - 《radio silence》

.oOo.

"-Felix?"

He hears his name but his body doesn't react. He feels surrounded by static. It clogs his ears, fogs over his eyes, pours down his throat. He is static.

"Felix," he hears again, and the voice is Beth's. He feels her hand on his arm, another on his back, and he's walking.

His feet are moving but he doesn't command them. The intense scent of smoke stings his nose and it's numbing.

"Don't worry," Beth's voice says, murky, and his eyes see her eyes in the fog. They have tears in them, and it makes tears appear in his. Why? Tears?

The static grows louder and he is buried deeper. His eyes dry up. Beth's blue eyes disappear, her voice is gone.

His hands feel numb and he can't move them. He doesn't want to move them.

He wants the static to swallow him.

A cry makes his head turn. So desperate, so anguished. He can see through the fog. It's Alice.

He feels the small beat inside his chest drum louder. Alice.

He blinks, she cries, his finger twitches. She slams her fists against the door. He can see the door now. Felix blinks, static fades, Alice falls to her knees.

.oOo.

Alice's fingers struggled with the doorknob, slipping and twisting. The door rattled on its hinges but didn't budge, and Alice took ragged breaths as something rattled against her breastplate.

Open the door! – She wanted to yell, but the words died and were buried in her throat, stuck behind the sobs she held on to. – Open this fucking door!

Her body slammed against the wood, shoulder first. Her chest hadn't been moving. She reared her leg back and kicked near the lock. Again, again, until she lost her footing. Diana hadn't been breathing. On her knees, her fists pounded on the door, vision became blurry.

She summoned all her strength, stood and tried to rip the door open, the result was just more nothing.

No. The world became black around her.

No. Her nails dug groves onto her arms, but she felt no pain.

She was dead. Alice's legs gave out beneath her. Like a demolished building, down she went, broken pieces flying.

She is dead. Her throat felt raw. Was she crying, screaming?

The knot in her chest choked her. Stop lying! Alice yelled, or thought she yelled. Her hand slapped her head, unable to pull at the roots of her braids. Fucking liar! Her fingers clenched to a fist and pounded against her skull, urging the lying voice to stop.

Desperation grew as the taunting words repeated in her mind. Her sister was dead.

She heard crying in the distance, so pitiful that it wrenched her heart. So hurtful. And getting closer. So much closer until Alice realized it was her own sobs.

Mom, dad. Now Diana. Don't lie to me.

Arms wound around her. They held her tight, and a voice whispered right by her ear. It's me. It sounded more familiar. Warmer.

Dad.

She stopped struggling, dumbstruck. The warmth of the embrace seeped through her skin. Something swelled inside her chest and spilled down her cheeks.

She is with us now, the voice said. Don't worry.

Alice shook her head. No, she repeated to herself. No. Please.

She felt defeat. It didn't matter how much she fought.

She was wicked. Her skin crawled with the hissing of the words. She deserved it. The voice had changed but she still recognized it. The begging, the confession, the knife in the gut.

Perturbed, Alice felt the fire return to her veins. The thrashing began anew, and she got free.

.oOo.

"It's me, it's Felix," he continued comfortingly, holding his limp sister. He didn't know what had made her become so aggressive and self-destructive. Like a wild animal caught in a trap.

He had to hold her, to keep her from hurting herself.

His forehead rested against her temple as she cried quiet tears and stared into nothing. "What happened?" he whispered, not expecting an answer.

Alice twisted her body and threw her arms open, catching Felix off-guard and releasing herself.

The door opened then, and Felix realized they were in a room. Glenn's face appeared, widening his field of vision.

"The hell? Did someone lock you in here?"

Alice shot to her feet and pushed past Glenn, disappearing from sight.

Glenn looked after her, but soon turned to Felix. He continued sitting on the ground he now felt, his fingers running along the wooden grooves.

The static was returning slowly, infecting him with a numbness that spread down his limbs. A hand on his shoulder stopped it, burning awareness into his skin.

Glenn again. "Hey, buddy. Let's get you downstairs."

Why downstairs? He voiced the question unintentionally.

"...Diana," was the hesitant answer.

Like a punch in the gut, he became winded as the memory was unearthed from its shallow grave.

He stopped in his path, somehow already halfway down the stairs, finally aware of his surroundings.

"Right," he said, dumbfounded, nodding endlessly.

Diana being carried inside the house, Alice over T-Dog's shoulder, a bloody knife on the floor, Beth's teary eyes. Darkness. Static.

Now slowly, his body coming to function. Emotions evoking reactions, like how the psychological pain made him want to puke his guts out. Or how the fear made his legs feel like they couldn't stand his weight.

By Glenn's supporting hand, he trembled his way to the living room, scared witless of what he'd see there.

"Felix." The relief was evident in her voice. "Are you okay?"

In that moment, he began to cry.

******

this was a very difficult chapter to write, I wanted it to feel raw and emotional. hope I could bring that across. please let me know what you think ^^