Because You're Mine (A Tom Hiddleston Fanfic) #Wattys2016 #pfcc2k16

Chapter Fourteen: Sandbag.

When we arrive at the hospital, my mind is so numbed that I don't even notice we are there until Tom opens my door and places a hand on my shoulder, slightly squeezing it to bring me back to reality.

"Whenever you're ready, babe" he says with the saddest smile I have ever seen. Is it wrong to feel so blessed right now? I have this amazing man who has never even heard about Rose, sharing my pain and supporting me. I don't think I will ever be ready for this but I force to lie to him and myself with a nod charged with resignation.

I step out of the car and he holds my hand all the way through the big glass doors and to the admission desk.

Of course, they won't let us come up to where Rose is because we are not family members and that's when I truly recognize how bad it is. She is in the ICU, where visitations are strictly monitored and only the closest members of the family can get through. Once at a time.

Rose and Joseph, despite of all the efforts they made over their younger years, couldn't have any children and I know for a fact that they don't have any other family but each other, so I start crying and screaming like a maniac when I realize that he must be so alone, sad and scared, all by himself.

Tom pushes me to a much less crowded corner of the waiting room and he cradles my face, bathed with tears, between his hands. His grip is strong and he keeps asking me to calm down. I know that this nervous breakdown is doing nothing but decreasing my chances to get up there, but I can't seem to control it. I am all tears and shouts and random insults towards everyone who's standing between me and the closest thing to a mother and father I have here in England.

"Calm down!" he screams right in my face. I snap out of my hysteria long enough to see how everybody is staring at us. I try to keep it as together as I can so I wipe off my tears and I sniff the water running down my nose. I must look like an authentic monster but I don't give a fuck, to be honest. My Aries sign starts to show when I see a couple of middle age people, looking at me with a disapproving frown on their faces.

"Excuse me! Have you never seen a person crying before? Fuck off!" I scream at the top of my lungs. They make a grimace and look away.

"Hey!" says Tom as he pulls my face on his direction, making me look up at him against my will. "Tell me what you need. Tell me what is it that I can do for you, but please, stop it!" he is scolding me, but I can only perceive tenderness in his voice. I take my time to think. To rearrange the chaos that is my mind right now. I want to be with them. That is all I want.

I can't move my head because he is holding me tightly but I move my eyes around the room and I see, at the corner of my eyes, two very intrigued nurses.

In a matter of seconds, I gather that they must be my age or even a little bit younger and they have recognized Tom. Not only they recognized him but, by the stupid look on their faces, I know that they are really excited to have him so near. I know that expression because that is probably the one I sported when I saw him for the first time; wide open jaw and timid giggling escaping from their throats.

I would be extremely jealous of them if it wasn't for the fact that their weakness has just became my best and only weapon against the hospital policies.

"Those girls seem really happy to see you. Maybe you should go and blind them with your charming blue eyes so I can sneak into the elevators" I say.

I would feel very ashamed of my suggestion if it weren't for the fact that I am willing to do whatever it takes to be with the Hendriks right now.

At this point I have no conscience whatsoever and even if I did, I am pretty sure that she would be on my side on this one. I know her very damn well by now and I can even guess the exact same words she would scream inside of my brain if she weren't so absent at the moment.