Because You're Mine (A Tom Hiddleston Fanfic) #Wattys2016 #pfcc2k16

Back At Your Door

You're my reason for living now. There's no way I'm giving up.

*****

I have no idea why I keep on dialing her number. Each time I do, I swear to myself that if I hear that woman's voice again, I will smash my cellphone against the floor and even jump all over it like a mentally ill man.

"The person you are trying to reach is not accepting calls at the moment. Please, try again later"

When her name appeared on my screen and I saw she had left me a voice message, I went through an emotional rampage that I believed it was going to wreck my nerves entirely.

First, I wanted to punch myself in the face for missing her call, then, when I heard her voice and how nervous and skittish she sounded, my heart felt this warm feeling I only experience when I am around and surrounded by her. The way she was notoriously fighting against her pride when she thanked me for that thing I thought she'd never find out gave me this renewed sense of optimism; letting me believe that I wasn't totally out of action with her. But a split of a second later, her voice changed and it was intimidatingly firm and full of purpose. Cold as stone and sharp as a razor.

"... Harry's here. I didn't know he was coming but I thought you should know... And don't worry about a thing! Even if I don't owe a single thing to you, if he tries to kiss me I'll make sure to put him in his place. Because that's what people do when kissed without permission..."

"Fuck!!" My throat feels like its ripped open when I scream, and though I swing my hand in the air with all the strength that I am capable of, the device remains between my clutching fingers. "Goddamnit!!"

This woman is going to be my doom, if she is not already.

She is punishing me for my crime. And I know that I just have to be a good lad and just take it, but this is so much more than I can bear.

I can take her hurtful words towards me, mostly because I know she says them out of spite; I can endure her not talking to me for days on end -although she doesn't seem to be able to carry out that resolve, which is good- and I can even let her put a fucking ocean in the middle of us if that means that she'll at least consider the idea of forgiving me.

But having her anywhere near that guy, I will not be able to take. Because I know he'll do anything to get her back. I mean, for heaven's sake, why wouldn't he? He would be an even bigger asshole if he didn't.

But there is no place for him in her life anymore, because she as mine as I am hers. I know that she knows this, but I also know that she is too hurt and angry to see it or too bloody stubborn to acknowledge it, so I will just keep on fighting my corner, with teeth and nails, until she's finally ready to come back to me.

One more try and I finally give up. She must be twenty thousand feet above the ground at this point and even if I could reach her, she would probably just ignore me.

While I wait for my computer to start, I pour myself a drink and I don't give a bloody fuck about the fact that is not even noon. Tea is not going to help with this situation so I won't even try.

"Hello, I see you have a flight leaving for New York City tonight" I am practically yelling at the poor lady who had the misfortune of taking my call. "Is there chance I could get on it? It is a rather urgent matter" I rush the last of my glass deep in my throat while I hear the sound of her fingers typing frantically on her keyboard.

"I am afraid we can't help you, Sr." she says with an overreacted tone of contrition. I want to scream in her ear. Tell her that she has to put me on that plane or so help me god. But I bite my tongue because there is no point, and she is not the one to blame for my problems.

"Are you sure! I can't stress it enough just how important it is for me to be in New York as soon as possible" I am now begging, ready to pour out my heart to this woman if necessary. "There is this..."

"Tomorrow morning. Nothing earlier" she cuts me off.

"I'll take it"

All I have to do is survive this bloody day. So I better continue with my drinking.