Billy the Kid Lich: Pt. 1
An Anti-hero is born! (A few millennia ago)
My name's Billy. I'm your average, everyday kid. I go to school, I do my homework, I hang out with friends, I trick unsuspecting mortals into thinking I am harmless before devouring their souls for all eternity and damning them to eternal torment, you know, normal things. Well, I guess maybe not to you.
So I am a lich. What is a lich, you might ask? Well, it is a creature originating in Scandinavian or Nordic mythology that typically disguises itself as something unassuming, harmless, and conspicuous. In reality, it is a terrifying eldritch abomination that should never have been allowed to exist, but does.
And I am one! I am currently 3,517 years old, and while that may sound pretty old to you, for a lich I'm only about a quarter of the way done growing. So guess where that puts looks-like-a-17-year-old me at for a couple centuries? That's right. High school. Yay. I'd rather be freaking execrated (to execrate is to wipe from existence).
A little more about me, I live alone here in the old U.S. of A. Specifically, near Orlando, Florida. We lich are a very independent people, we don't dislike our own kind, we just want a nice town to haunt by ourselves. This of course makes those "well-who-actually-lured-in-that-poor-mortally-terrified-human" questions not come up at all, which is nice. We also like being the only ones at the buffet. Lastly, it's nice to have a global network, yes, global, queue the shrieking audience member, and to have connections everywhere. Let me make it clear we certainly do respect one another.
Appearance is really important to us. It's how you trick a human, or a critter if you're desperate, into following you somewhere you can give their soul the good succ (meme reference, teehee). As for me, I prefer to appear as a 6'1" kid, with a sprinter's build, not totally buff, but in shape, and with a mop of brown hair on my head reminiscent of the Beatles, but messier. And moppier.
Our maturity actually does match our outward physical appearance (assuming we're being honest about what we look like), as you may have picked up on already. Fart jokes were funny for, like, three centuries! Eugh!
Anyways. You may be asking, what does a lich do in their free time? Stir that cauldron, make spooky sounds, shuffle around dark alleyways? Firstly, I'd like to say its 2017 and it's time to stop #Lichtyping. We do stuff normal humans do. TV, movies, books, board games, video games, you name it.
I myself and am avid gamer. I've been going at it since the days of Pong. Man, arcades were the best! It was so easy to get some unsuspecting kid to follow you "back to my house, where we can play my Atari as much we like, for free!" and then just give that soul a big ol' slurp. Yum. Good times.
With some background out of the way, let's get right into my story! It's fairly long, but never dull, so with that being said, let's get it!
End of Part 1.
- Will P.
YOU ARE READING
The Kid Lich Awakens
Aventura#2 In greatstories! (At it's highest ever point) Everything was normal for Billy, or at least, as normal as life gets when you're a sapient undead. But when an angry and suspicious god comes knocking, Billy has to face the consequences of his wanton...
