Hold your Hand || Johnny Cade x Reader

⚡ i wanna hold your hand⚡

A few weeks had passed since that fateful detention. Johnny and Ponyboy walked home together again, as usual; they cut through the old field behind the school and were on their way to their neighborhood when Ponyboy spoke. "So... wanna go back to my place? I know we both have homework, but we could also always go hang out with one of the gang-"

Johnny looked uncomfortable as he cut in. "Actually, [Y/N] invited me over to study today, so I don't have much time to hang out..."

Ponyboy looked surprised, but his face settled into a smug expression, his eyebrows raised. "Is that so, Johnny?"

Johnny flushed red. "Aw, cut it out... it's nothing, really. Maybe I'll just go over there now!"

Ponyboy raised both hands in the air in mock surrender. "By all means. I'm not one to keep a guy from seeing his gal!"

Johnny glared at him; the tips of his ears felt hot. "Pony..."

"Alright, alright. Have fun."

Johnny said bye and promptly realized he and [Y/N] hadn't talked about where to meet, and he didn't know where she lived other than somewhere in the West Side. He bit his lip. Were they - really even plans, then?

He walked back to the school with no plan in mind and broke into a run when he saw [Y/N] walking away from the school a few feet ahead. He caught up to her, but hesitated to talk. Glancing around, he decided that for the first time, he didn't care what everyone around him thought. [Y/N] was alone, and he fell into step beside her. "Um, hey, [Y/N]. Are we- still on to do homework together?"

[Y/N]'d startled when he'd started speaking, and she glanced around nervously, and Johnny suddenly felt stupid, regretting his sudden bold decision to approach her in front of so many people. He was starting to mumble an apology or a "Never mind" and walk away, but she caught his arm. Heat flooded his body again- "Oh, Johnny, it's okay, wait-"

She regained composure and forced herself to walk confidently next to Johnny, ignoring whatever reactions her peers may have had. A few moments of walking together later, she responded to his initial question. "Yes, I can study with you today. Are your parents alright with it?"

Johnny blinked and looked down. "Yeah, they're- they wouldn't mind. I mean, they don't, no. They're glad I'm gonna get my grades up."

[Y/N] studied his face. "Mmm, okay."

The day was chilly and windy. [Y/N] tucked a wayward lock of hair behind her ear as they continued to watch in silence, Johnny kicking a rock along in front of him. Eventually they arrived at [Y/N]'s house. "Here we are."

Johnny looked at the house in awe. "Gee, I've never been inside a house so..." At an apparent loss for words, he trailed off. 

[Y/N] laughed as she unlocked the door. "Yeah... Oh, my parents know you're coming. They know all about you. Don't worry." The two stepped inside. 

She talks about me? Johnny smiled to himself, oddly satisfied at the thought.

The two made their way to [Y/N]'s room. Her room was very pink, light and girly - it felt oddly comforting and cute to Johnny, who was still in mild shock at the fact that he was in a Soc's bedroom.

[Y/N] cleared her throat, snapping Johnny's attention back to her. She was standing somewhat awkwardly in the middle of the room; Johnny startled at her expression. She seemed so uncomfortable, and in her own house? He figured it was him; he glanced away.

"Here, uhm, you can sit..." She started to pull out her desk chair, but, upon realizing there were no more chairs and thus no room for both her and Johnny at the desk, she instead sat on her bed, folding her legs under her. "We can sit here, I guess."

As Johnny fidgeted and tried to sit comfortably on a Soc girl's bed, [Y/N] spread her homework and books out in front of her, then scooped up a pillow and held it tightly in front of her chest. Johnny finally settled on mimicking her, sitting cross-legged and shrinking into himself. 

[Y/N] cleared her throat a second time, then set down the pillow, reaching over and opening a textbook. "You didn't bring your books?"

Johnny coughed. "No, I-"

"It's fine, we're really just studying anyway." She paused, then slid him a notebook. "You'll want to take notes, though."

Johnny found himself smiling. Then he leaned over the history text and took turns reading it out loud with [Y/N], and taking notes on what she told him too. He couldn't read too well. [Y/N] didn't seem to notice, or care; when they were done with the required reading pages, she silently took his notes, read them through, and made little marks. When he got the paper back, he examined it for changes, then looked up at her. She smiled. She'd corrected spelling mistakes. What did he make of that? He studied her expression. Shy. Kind. Finally, he smiled back at her. She really wanted to help him. And that was all.

A rustling of pages broke the silence. [Y/N] was flipping through her own notebook. "We can get started on the homework. The essay, I mean. Just go through the notes, or the text, and find details for the draft."

Johnny nodded, and started on the task. As he did so, he felt a small glimmer of something expand in his chest... hope. He'd always cared about passing his classes, and tried his best, but he'd always made himself content with his best being just decent. There had never been anyone who could help him, besides Ponyboy, but even Ponyboy couldn't always help him. He cared, but not enough to actually, actively seek help. But he was feeling hopeful a lot lately. About this... and hopeful in general. Ever since he'd met [Y/N].. huh.

[Y/N] started singing softly, to herself more than anything. It was quiet, throaty and interspersed with humming. Johnny recognized it - some overplayed love song - but in this moment, the sound made him warm and happy inside. He worked up the courage to comment on it eventually. 

"[Y/N], that's really pretty."

She startled, seeming to have forgotten he was there; when she realized what he was referring to, she looked a little flustered. "Yeah... thanks."

A few moments later, she started up the song again. "...I wanna hold your hand..."

Johnny felt something unfamiliar stirring inside him. His own hand twitched as he listened to her singing, eventually abandoning his schoolwork entirely and... imagining it. In flashes, he thought about how her hand would feel in his... he'd bet they were soft. Softer than his, at least. Would she ever let him do that?

[Y/N] crooned the final chorus, and in an uncharacteristically bold move, Johnny reached over, and paused with his hand hovering over hers. She looked up, realized what he was doing. "Oh- Johnny, it's just a... song..."

"I know."

[Y/N] said nothing, and then she turned her hand, palm up. Johnny slipped his hand into it, gingerly, and closed his fingers around her hand. [Y/N]'s eyes were on him the whole time. Maybe he should've thought before doing something so bold, but he was glad he hadn''t. [Y/N] closed her fingers around his, tighter than Johnny would've expected, and they sat there in silence for a few moments. 

[Y/N] continued to hum the song. 

Johnny started to sing along softly, hesitantly, and [Y/N] smiled in encouragement. 

The moment was perfect, and it ended much too soon. Johnny'd always been scared of girls, but a moment like this let him realize that it was possible to feel completely comfortable with one. He didn't feel scared now. 

[Y/N] gave his hand a little squeeze - sending a hot jolt through his body - and untangled her hand from his. "What time do ya need to be back, Johnny?"

He shrugged, pulling his hand back into his own lap. "Now, I guess."

"Alright."

[Y/N] helped him gather the notes he'd taken, and led him to the front door. 

Halfway out the door, he turned back. "Hey...bye, and thanks. For everything."

[Y/N] smiled and looked down, shyly. "Of course, Johnny. Anytime."

She didn't know how much that meant to him.