Dear myself I guess?

Secret spots, and bad feelings.

*TW* cussing I guess. This will be the last time I just put a warning for cussing, because at this point everyone should know that there's going to be cussing in the chapters.

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"Collin it's time to wake up, you're going to be late to school." My eyes shot open, and I jumped out of my bed. I ran to my closet to find my clothes, I chose a black hoodie, black jeans with rips, and my black converse. I ran downstairs got a piece of toast and booked it outside to my car.

I drove for about 10 minutes, and then pulled up to the school. I got out of my car and started walking to the school building. I turned around when I heard someone say my name. "Yo Collin" it was Derek.

"Hey Derek what's up" I started thinking back to last night when Steven yelled at me.

Derek looked at me like he was trying to figure me out, i just stared back and waited for him to respond.

"Nothing much, I just wanted to ask if you're alright you know after last night" he looked at me with concern and curiosity.

"Yeah I'm okay" I gave him a short answer and turned away and practically ran into the school.
I was stopped by Eli putting a hand on my shoulder.

"Dude where's the fire" he asked laughing at my fast pace.

"Shut the fuck up, Derek asked me about last night and I didn't know what to do so I said I'm okay and ran away" he just laughed harder at that.

"Dumbass" he choked out from his laughter. I waited for him to calm down, and when he finally did I slapped him in the back of the head and he looked like I just kicked his puppy.

"That's what you get for laughing at my stupidity" I walked away heading to my locker while he followed me. Alex was standing there waiting for us.

"Why does Eli look like someone kicked his puppy" they asked laughing. Eli just glared at them while I tried to hide my laughter.

"He laughed at me for running away from Derek so I smacked him" I told them, and they just laughed harder. "Fuck off Lex" they glared at me after that and I just smiled proudly knowing how much they hate that name.

"Haha very funny Colleen" I just stared at them in shock, and then laughed it off realizing they were just joking and don't know the truth behind that name.

"Hey guys" I startled turning around facing a confused looking Derek. I turned away and opened my locker getting my stuff for english class. The bell rang just when I get done packing my stuff away, so I hurry up and close my locker and run to class followed by the other 3.

We get to class and sit down with Derek beside me again. Everyone was talking while I was just sitting and thinking about what happened last night. The teacher walked in and everyone got quiet.

"Alright class I'm assigning a partner project" everyone groaned, she just laughed at us and continued talking. "This project will be half of your grade so I hope y'all will actually do it, and I'm assigning partners" again everyone groaned.

"Eli and Alex, Lottie and Tony..." I zoned out after that until I heard my name. "Collin and Derek" I perked up a little after that, but still kinda embarrassed from yesterday and this morning.

Derek looked at me and smiled his gorgeous smile, and I couldn't help but smile back.

The teacher went on about the project until the bell rang, everyone jumped up and ran out the door.

*skip to lunch because I'm lazy"

At lunch time Alex, Eli, Derek, and I walked to our lunch table. We had our own lunches so screw the lunch line. We all sat down, and everyone started eating besides me. Eli looked at me knowingly and mouthed 'eat your lunch please' I gave him a small smile and started eating.

Eli started talking about football, and Derek immediately smiled and joined in on the conversation.

"I love football, I'm going to try-out for the team next week I'm excited" I smiled at him, he looked so happy talking about football.

"We can try-out together, I've been on the football team since freshman year and this year I'm hoping I'll be chose for captain" Eli responded back to Derek, I zoned out after because they started talking about what to do with football and all that stuff. I like watching the sport, but I don't play and I don't know much about it in playing wise.

The bell soon rang for lunch to be over, we all packed up and went to our classes.

*skip to after school*

Classes were over, and thank god there was no drama today. I don't think I could handle anymore of it, yesterday was enough for me. I decided to not go home yet, I texted my mom and told her I'll be home late. I decided to go to my secret spot I found my freshman year after I got stressed, and needed space from everyone and everything.

I drove to the park, got out of my car, and started walking to the woods near the park. I found the little path I'm so used to, and walked down it. There was a bridge at the end of the path, I walked to it and sat on the ledge of it. I looked down at the water, it was so blue. It reminded me of what water looks like in movies, it was beautiful.

I loved being here, it was so peaceful. I got down from the ledge, and sat on the bridge. I got my journal from my bag, and started writing.

𝘿𝙚𝙖𝙧 𝙢𝙮𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛...

𝙃𝙚𝙮 𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛, 𝙩𝙤𝙙𝙖𝙮 𝙬𝙖𝙨𝙣'𝙩 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙖𝙮 𝙖 𝙗𝙖𝙙 𝙙𝙖𝙮 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙞 𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙚. 𝙄 𝙖𝙡𝙨𝙤 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙤𝙣 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙖 𝙗𝙖𝙙 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜, 𝙞𝙩'𝙨 𝙬𝙝𝙮 𝙞'𝙢 𝙘𝙪𝙧𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙡𝙮 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙝𝙤𝙢𝙚. 𝙎𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙗𝙖𝙙 𝙞𝙨 𝙜𝙤𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤 𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙚𝙣 𝙞 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙩𝙚𝙡𝙡. 𝙄'𝙢 𝙨𝙘𝙖𝙧𝙚𝙙, 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞𝙛 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙙𝙨 𝙤𝙪𝙩. 𝙏𝙝𝙚𝙮 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙩𝙚𝙡𝙡 𝙥𝙚𝙤𝙥𝙡𝙚, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙞 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙗𝙚 𝙖𝙣 𝙤𝙪𝙩𝙘𝙖𝙨𝙩. 𝙄 𝙝𝙖𝙩𝙚 𝙝𝙞𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜, 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙞 𝙙𝙤. 𝙁𝙪𝙘𝙠, 𝙢𝙮 𝙢𝙤𝙢 𝙩𝙚𝙭𝙩𝙚𝙙. 𝘽𝙮𝙚 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛.

I closed the journal and put it back in my bag, I looked at my phone to see what my mom said

ᴍᴏᴍ ~ 𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝗻𝗼𝘄.
ᴍᴇ ~ 𝗼𝗻 𝗺𝘆 𝘄𝗮𝘆.

I jumped up, got my stuff and rushed to my car. This does not take any of my worries away, it sounded urgent. Oh god what if someone found out, what if something bad happened to someone. Fuck fuck fuck.

I got to my car, and got in fast. I started the car and drove home as fast as I could without getting pulled over. I drove up the driveway, I saw a random car parked beside the house. I got out of the car fast, and ran inside. I opened the door and... there he was.

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Hey, so I'm back. I decided to start writing again (I was also being told to write lmao) anygays I don't know if I'm back for sure. But I'll be updating some more. Also I know there's a cliffhanger, my bad but I needed something to add ✨spice✨ to the chapter since it was kinda bland and boring. Okay bye for now, but first 1255 words.

Have a great day ~ Archie ❤️