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IF PETER DIDN'T KNOW ANY BETTER, HE WOULD'VE THOUGHT HE SET HIS FRIENDS UP FOR AN INTERVENTION. Both MJ and Ned looked at him with either concern (Ned) or passive aggression (MJ—how was that even possible?) and then back to the laptop that sat on the dining table in Peter's apartment, a PowerPoint presentation open that was promptly titled "Theo Standen is an A**: A Proposition by Peter Parker" (never has Peter ever seen so many P's in his life).
"Now you're probably wondering why I called you both in here," Peter started looking at his two best friends who have now gone from concerned and passive aggressive to subtly worried, "I'm here to make a proposition."
"As much as you want to dispute your claim, you can't fight the hat, Pete," Ned interjected, "and even if you could, it's way too late to change lab partners. MJ and I have already come up with a hypothesis and we're about to start on our research."
"Wait, wait. Back it up." Peter held up his hands before pointing a finger at the two of them, "You and MJ? Since when? I'm your best friend and you didn't tell me?"
"If I had told you, you wouldn't have supported it," Ned confessed, eyebrows expressive.
"Damn right, I wouldn't have!" Peter exclaimed, getting a subtle eyebrow raise out of MJ, watching on as Peter's chest heaved a little too heavily for his liking. "Sorry. I'm just a little pissed about the situation."
"What's wrong with Theo, anyway?" Ned questioned, "He got here, like, a month ago. How much havoc could he have actually wreaked for you to get like this?"
"That's why I have this." Peter dramatically lengthened his pointing stick before slapping it against his computer screen to point them back to his presentation. The room shifted then and the three of them were all squared away in a classroom—no lights were on save for the flicker of the old-school slide projector. Peter stood up in front of the board, MJ was sitting bored in one of the desks, and Ned, like always, was at the teacher's desk like the guy in the chair to help move the presentation along.
"They say that in order to make friends, you need to make a few enemies, right? Wrong." Peter slapped his pointing stick against the board to start his presentation. "Theo Standen is an Ass: A Case Study in Midtown's Newest Terrorizer—A Proposition by Peter Parker. Ned, my man, next slide." There was a click, and the next slide came into view, showing a picture of Theo's school ID. "Theo Standen is a natural enemy—don't ask how I got a picture of his ID. I just know people. Theo Standen is not one to make friends."
"How do you even know this?" MJ interrupted, unprompted.
"Spidey senses, MJ. Spidey senses. Okay, moving on. Considering that we're not allowed to switch lab partners this far into the project, I have come to make a proposition. And that proposition is that you'll take me on any excursions that allow me to avoid Theo at all costs."
