The Runt of the Litter

Going Back Won't Feel the Same If We Aren't Staying

Note: Hey, loves. Three in a row??? Holy crap, I know! And the chapter's not even super short!

This takes place post-finale, as @kindnesspeople asked for ages and ages ago. You're always so sweet with your comments, so, from the bottom of my emo heart, I hope you enjoy this <3

This also goes out to @Musicpotterhead , une fille que je t'aime. You've been such a rock for me over the past year. And I know you've had a hard time yourself. 

Title comes from a lyric in Franklin by Paramore. It's on their first album, and it has a special place in my heart, so I encourage you to listen. Guys, if I made a playlist with every song referenced in a chapter (title or otherwise) and posted the spotify code... would y'all listen to that? Anyways-

In the present, Anna is twenty-two. In the flashback scene, she's seventeen.

Going Back Won't Feel the Same If We Aren't Staying

"Jesus," Alex whispered, so quiet that Anna almost didn't hear her. She pulled a pack of cigarettes out of her pocket and held it out to Anna, who took one, before grabbing one out for herself. "You really weren't kiddin' when you said this place looked different."

"Weird, isn't it?" Anna replied. "It got bigger with the housing development and everything, but I swear to god it looks smaller."

In tandem, she and Alex pulled zippos from their pockets and flicked up little flames with which to light their cigarettes. They took their first drag at the same time, but Anna released her breath slowly, and Alex let hers go in a rush.

"Sam doesn't even live here anymore, you know," Anna said softly, her voice a little rough the way it had gotten after a year of smoking.

"I know," Alex said. She took another drag, slower this time, but Anna just held her cig between her index and middle fingers, letting it bleed smoke into the otherwise mostly-clean Kansas air. I figured he asked us to meet him here for a case or something."

"No," Anna said, her voice darker this time. She was frowning, staring with hard eyes at the buildings across the street. She scuffed the bottom of her sneaker hard against the sidewalk beneath their feet. "He wanted me distracted."

"Distracted?" Alex asked, puzzled. She turned to look at Anna, tucked her beanie down over her ears. "From what?"

Anna's expression gave nothing away as she was careful not to let it. But she looked down at the ground, took a long drag off her cig. "From the date," she admitted on an exhale, smoke trailing out of her nose as well as her mouth. It burned, made her choke once, something she rarely did anymore when she was smoking.

"The second?" Alex asked. "The hell's the second?"

"Happy anniversary," was all Anna said.

"Uh, okay," Alex drawled and then hurried to keep up when Anna pushed off the side of the car and walked toward the cross walk. "You realize that was completely unhelpful, right?" She had to dance to avoid a hole in the sidewalk, mumbled to herself, "Some things haven't changed at least."

"Yeah, that was your hint to stop asking," Anna called over her shoulder, gazing straight ahead like looking anywhere else would mean risking her life. "Sam's waitin' at the cafe."

"You might wanna put the cig out before we get there," Alex suggested from behind her. "If I remember one thing about Sam, it's how much of a mother hen he is."

"Yeah, well, I'm not a kid anymore. Doesn't really matter how much mothering he wants to do."

Anna stepped off the curb onto the crosswalk, making a driver curse and slam on the breaks. She looked with dead eyes at the person behind the wheel, watched them make a sour face at her without reacting. Then she glanced back at Alex. "You know, I thought I missed this place."