Suicide Watch

Chapter 16

Isa POV

I try to do the baking myself. Key word is try as I am not very successful. It feels like everything that can go wrong goes wrong, and in the end, I am left with a burnt bath of cupcakes.

I pride myself on being pretty good at cooking. But one way or the other, this talent does not translate over to baking.

Regardless, I settle down at the dining table with the burnt cupcakes before me. I tell myself that it probably looks a lot worse than it really is. So, against my better judgment, I take a bite out of one cupcake.

Needless to say, I never ingest that bite, and end up throwing the whole batch of cupcakes out.

I'm in a bad mood and I'm not sure why. I want to tell myself that it's due to how my cupcakes came out, but I know the real reason was Temi. It hurts my pride to admit this to myself. I've been with her for weeks now. I'm used to Temi and her anger, her sudden mood swings and unpredictability.

Yet, her words towards me earlier on put a significant damper on my mood. I know I can't suddenly start caring about her now. Not only is that unprofessional, but it's also just setting myself up for a lot of hurt.

Temi is my assignment, not my friend. And as much as I don't want to admit it, Temi was right in saying just that. I shouldn't be trying to make cupcakes with her. I shouldn't care whether she speaks to me. The only thing that I should care about regarding her is keeping her alive. After all, that is my mission here.

Hopefully, this will all be over soon. I'd finally have enough saved up to retire comfortably from being a bodyguard, and spend the rest of my time painting and drawing and doing whatever else it is that makes me happy with the rest of my life ahead of me.

Maybe if I'm lucky, I might even fall in love and finally find myself someone to settle down with. But luck isn't really my thing. Hence, why I am even in the position that I am in right now. Any other bodyguard could have gotten this job. But yet, I ended up being the one to draw the short side of the stick.

I sigh to myself and my mind momentarily wanders off to Joshua. If he could hear my thinking right now, he'd tell me off for being so "pessimistic". A small smile creeps onto my face as I remember how driven he was. How he was always so eager to do his best, no matter what it took. Not even if it meant him risking his life.

I look down at my thigh, tracing Joshua's name etched into my skin with my pinky finger. A small, sad smile creeps onto my face as I remember him.

The walk to campus for Temi's last midterm exam feels even more awkward than usual. I do not tell Temi 'good morning' like I usually do each day (even though she never replies). I do not lay out breakfast for her. I basically just ignored her, like she does to me each day.

And after all, none of these things are in the job description of being a bodyguard.

As we walk, I can't stop myself from sneaking occasional glances at Temi. Her black and green braids fall past her waist, swishing softly as she walks. It frames her face perfectly and I think that waiting almost 10 hours for her to complete her braids was totally worth it.

We arrive at the building for Temi's final exam and, without even a glance in my direction, Temi walks away. I watch her go, wishing that I did not feel so hollow. It is a strange feeling. Not only is this emotion something that I cannot place, but it's also something that I cannot understand.

Waiting for Temi to finish her exam seems to take longer than usual. I don't miss the brief flutter that passes through me when I catch sight of her black-green braids a while later. I ignore it and push it down.