I'm laying here in the dark, supposed to be asleep. The air cold against my bare skin, the pillow bugging me with its uncomfortablilty, the house nearly silent. Each time I move the sound is all I hear, my breath louder then the cars outside, my skin begging to be scratched where a bug bite lies on my leg, but my mind is silent.
It's 11:11pm, 1/16/22, a Sunday
It's weird. Werid to have such peace in my mind, but it's a blessing. Why isn't my head full of thoughts as usual? I have no clue... All I feel is....calm. It's relaxing. Reassuring. Weird. I wish I had the feeling more often though, it's so nice to have a break, no matter how short.
Is this what normal people have? Is this why people drink or do drugs? For this momentarily bliss of silence and just calmness?
I take a deep breath, breathing is the cool air, making my body even calmer. I wish I could bottle up this feeling like I do with so many others. I want to keep it safe and sound among my collection, opening it when I need this calmness. But no. I can't do that. It's to easy.
Oh no my thoughts are starting up again, killing the calmness I once felt. I guess the break was short.
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Random Thoughts...
RandomJust some random thoughts of mine, I know I am crazy no need to point it out. #1 in mymind 1/30/22
