The Gisborne Chronicles

CHR5/CH2-Guy Overhears a Secret, and 'The Gathering'

"That man of yours is brooding on something," said Aunt Gwyneth a day or so later, " have there been harsh words between you?"

" He has been this way since he helped Glenys deliver her boy,"  replied Auriel, " but if I question him on it, he refuses to answer. If he does speak, it is of the farm or the family, otherwise we do not converse at all, something has hold of him that I have no knowledge of."

" I believe you know what is troubling him," said Aunt Gwyneth, " and doubtless you think that it is not my place to meddle in your marital disputes, but that man is like a son to me, and it breaks my heart to see him brought so low. Now, am I to be allowed to speak?"

"You may speak Aunt," said Auriel, " but an apt response is not guaranteed!"

"Not guaranteed! My God girl, your husband is drowning in the mire of his own misery, have you no heart? The man desires another child, yet you deny him! This preventative you so freely imbibe is against nature taken in such great quantities, 'a month or so,' you said, 'until I recover my strength.' It has been nigh on a year!"

" A year of freedom!" shouted Auriel, "freedom from months of not owning my own body, freedom from the agony of childbirth! Why should I submit to my husband's wishes when mine are of so little account? I am no mere chattel, nor do I ever intend to be so! Five living children I have carried for him, and one dead. Enough is enough, and I'll not be deterred. My body is mine and not the mere receptacle of my husband's seed!"

"Receptacle girl, receptacle? said Aunt Gwyneth, " the man loves you to distraction and adores all of his children, he has a right to expect this of you."

"Did he have a right to watch me labour in agony for two days?" She asked. Does he have the right to put my life in peril, and that of our child? Does he have the right to make me dread the thought of childbirth? No, he does not! Sweet Christ, is your memory so short, Abigail was almost the death of me!"

"I well remember that day," she continued, glaring at her aunt, " you demanded that I make a choice and I refused, I was willing to give my own life to save her, and she is the most precious of all my children because of it. I have done my part. Guy is the world to me, but there will be no more children."

She turned as she heard him behind her, then he spoke.

" I have dreaded this day," he said, "the day when all my hopes turned to ash. Without the blessing of children, there can be no true marriage. It is said that God favours holy wedlock, words from the lips of your own daughter, and yet you make this choice without me. Am I of so little consequence to you?"

"Sweet man, I love you more than my life," she replied, " and our children are the world to me, but what you ask is more than I can give you. I no longer have the strength to spend nine long months dreading the agony that is to come. After Abigail, each time you got me with child I feared that it would end in another two days of labouring. There were times when I thought God would take me, but the joy in your face, stifled my words. You call me your brave girl......but it is so ill deserved." Then the dreadful sobbing began.

As he moved swiftly to comfort her, he looked to Aunt Gwyneth, " did you know of her fears?" he asked.

"I suspected, but as she never spoke of it, I let it lie," she replied, " it is as well you overheard, for I believe it would have festered between you. She has kept silent out of love for you, knowing how badly you wanted a large family."

"Eight years," said Guy, "she has kept silent for eight years, we were blessed with the swift and easy birth of our twins, then  after Abigail she was fearful of what was to come! How can I make this right, tell me for God's sake, tell me! Listen to her! dear God, listen to her!"