Bittersweet

1

Yoongi has a good life. A good life with a good home, a stable job, and the best little girl he could ever ask for, it was perfect. It took a lot for him to say that. It took practically years of therapy to get him to this point. Between the incident,  Hoseok disappearing and the band splitting up, the years of therapy were needed. It resulted in Yoongi moving to America soon after Mari was born.

It was hard at first, raising a child on his own. Thankfully the money he accumulated from all his years in Bangtan helped so much. It was scary too, being all alone with no one to help him and comfort him during his worst days. He almost ended up wanting to call it quits, had the pills ready and everything until he heard his baby cry. Then right after comforting her, just holding her in his arms, Yoongi realized his new purpose in life.

His daughter meant everything to him, and he'd be damned if he was going to leave her all alone. He was all she had in this little world, and she was the only one to keep him sane. Well, besides his therapist. But that was her job after all, to let people talk about their troubles in order to not go insane. Honestly this world would be a lot worse without them.

Speaking of jobs actually, Yoongi found himself working at a little instrument repair shop not too far from his apartment. It was mostly just guitars and other smaller instruments, but his favorite thing about the place was the old ebony piano sitting in front of the window. Sometimes he'd like to sit and play, as his fingers hit the notes he was reminded of a time not too long ago. Nostalgia at it's best, really. It made him laugh and sometimes feel bittersweet because more often than not, most people would come in just to hear him play.

It'd been years, so no one really cared that he used to be in the world's most famous boy band. While at first millions of armies were devastated, for the most part they understood why the boys split up. There was some nasty hate for a little while, so many wild theories about how Hoseok disappeared, but it eventually all died down. At least now he could walk outside without a million cameras and voices screaming his name. Peaceful as it was, he wouldn't lie and say he didn't miss everyone.

After the disbandment had been finalised, Yoongi sort of just bolted. He bought the first plane ticket he could find and found him a place in Miami. He didn't go on social media or reply to everyone who has tried texting and calling him. He ghosted everyone, his friends, family. Not like his parents really wanted anything to do with him, it was mostly just his brother asking if he was okay.

Eventually they all had given up. Yoongi remembered the day when Namjoon had sent him a long message wishing him well and hoping that he was having a nice life. That was the last he ever heard of him. Until recently, that is. He had been sitting on the couch, finalising the repair orders for the week when he got the email.

He'd just put Mari to bed and so decided to indulge himself with a glass of wine. It was a just small glass, nothing major. Upon reading the email, he didn't feel like drinking anymore though. It was actually more of a letter of sorts, and attached at the bottom was an invitation. A wild assortment of emotions raced through his body and mind as he started reading.

To: YGmin93@gmail.com
From: KimNamjoon912@gmail.com
Subject: Invite

Hello Yoongi hyung,

Perhaps I should call you Yoongi-ssi now, right? Ah, I guess it's not really that important regarding this email. Anyways, I know we haven't spoken in a long time but I'd like to let you know that I'm getting married soon. It won't be that big of an event, just my fiancè's family, my family, and hopefully, Bangtan. Plus a couple of friends close friends.

This is a very important event in my life and it wouldn't feel right if the most important people in my life some years ago weren't there. I'm not saying you have to come, it's completely up to you. I honestly don't know if this is the right email, but I really hope it is, otherwise this would be awkward. I know things were tough back then, it was quite the mess wasn't it? I apologize, I'm not trying to make you remember all the bad stuff.

The point is that I want you there, if you want to come that is. I want the people I shared a huge part of my life with to see the next huge step in my life. My fiancè helped me work up the courage to email this, I really hope you're reading. It's been years, hyung, I really miss you. I miss everyone.

If you can't come, it's okay. If you don't want to come, that's okay too. If you do decide to come, here are the details. It's going to be in Seoul, at the Kwang Hotel garden. It's right next to Han River so you can't miss it.

It's only been recently built, but the venue is so nice. I've sent a link down below of the official form you fill out if you're RSVPing. Everything will be taken care of too, your hotel room, the seating arrangements and the food. All you have to do is bring yourself and well, a couple of suitcases of course haha. Oh, and there's an option for a plus one if you need it.

I feel like I've rambled on too much, so I'm going to leave this email here. It'd be really nice to see your face again hyung. I hope to see you soon. Here's the link.

Sincerely,

Kim Namjoon

Yoongi's eyes were watering by the time he finished reading. He couldn't believe it, Namjoon was getting married? And after all these years he still thought of his old band members? The noirette chuckled wetly, wiping his eyes. He clicked on the link at the end, debating whether or not he should fill it out.

He started to, but then got to the option of the plus one. Would it be alright if he brought his daughter? He couldn't just leave her here though, the longest time she's ever been without him was when she was at daycare while he was working. Plus flying from here to Seoul would be a long flight. At the same time, it would be nice for Mari to discover her roots.

Yoongi's tried bringing Korean culture into their home, having Mari speak only Korean when she's home and eating the traditional Korean dishes. It was hard to get the ingredients sometimes, but Yoongi tried his best. Mari would probably like it if she was around so many people that looked like her, not really having many asian kids in her class. It would be good for her to discover where her father came from, his history and life from before. Then again, that also caused Yoongi to become hesitant.

It's not like he hid his old lifestyle from his daughter, she was just too young to truly get it at the moment. She wouldn't understand that her dad used to sing and rap and dance almost 24 hours a day, wear makeup and get bombarded by cameras. God forbid she find out about the fans, or vice versa. Though, that wasn't the main fear Yoongi had. No, his main fear was Hoseok.

Namjoon had mentioned he missed everyone, that included Hoseok. They didn't part on good terms, hardly any terms at all really. Had Namjoon written an email like this to him? Would he show up at the wedding and see Yoongi with their-his-child? He didn't really want to bring any tension when it was supposed to be a happy time for his old band leader.

Yoongi sighed, not sure what to do. Suddenly he heard the floor creak and looked over to see his daughter standing in the hallway. She had her thumb in her mouth and clutching a rabbit plushie. She looked so scared, almost as if she had a nightmare. Yoongi motioned for her to come to him and she did, climbing into his lap almost instantly.

"Did you have a bad dream angel?" He asked as he ran his fingers through her hair. He tried not to think of the person he used to do the same for.

Mari nodded, a sob in the back of her throat. Yoongi held her in his arms as she cried, whispering soft and comforting words to quell her fears away. Eventually her cries died down, and her breathing became even. The father took the young girl back to her room, kissing her forehead as he left. Then he went back to the living room, got his computer and clicked plus one.

He could end up regretting this decision, but something was pushing him to go. It was like his heart and mind finally agreed on something for once. The man sighed as he logged off his computer and went to bed. Yoongi fell asleep and dreamt of being on a stage with a warm hand slipped in his own. Whether or not this was a good idea, time would only tell.