Opia / D.M 18+

C I N G U L O M A N I A

{A strong desire to hold a person in your arms}

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There was a knock on my door, causing me to jolt awake. I was still on the bathroom floor, huddled in the corner, hidden away from the world I didn't want to be a part of. I hissed through my teeth as I stood, my limbs had calmed down, but my hands wouldn't stop shaking and jolting by themselves. I walked out into my room and opened the door with a loud sigh, slightly aggravated that I had been woken up. The knocking only got progressively louder as I waddled over to the door.

I glared at first but was slightly shocked to see both Narcissa and Snape outside. Snape looked down the hall as I opened the door while Narcissa looked at me with a wan smile, "You're expected to leave in twenty minutes, Severus needs to get back." She tried to smile, though it came out weak, "And I assume you'd like to say goodbye to Opalite?" 

I bit my lip and nodded painfully, there was a migraine brewing behind my eyes, "I'll get dressed. Could you possibly bring up a pain relief potion?" I asked lightly to which she nodded and backed away with Snape, "And some bandages?" I spoke quickly. Narcissa paused and looked towards my arm, along with Snape. My eyes widened as I realised I was only in a singlet, I quickly hid my arm behind my back, " For my ankle," I lied, "I hurt it during training." 

Narcissa gave another non-convincing smile before turning to walk into Opal's room. Snape walked quickly down the hall and made his way towards my father's office. I closed the door and rested my head on the wood, silently cursing myself for not wearing a shirt with long sleeves. I tiredly got myself dressed in my Hogwarts uniform and readied myself to say goodbye to Opal. I told myself to take deep breaths and focus on trying to control the shaking and twitching. 

I was filled with an excitement I found hard to believe. I had survived, I was strong. I had done it. I had held on, I may have cracked, but I was going to see him and everything was going to go back to how it was supposed to be. Two weeks is a long time to go with a tight chest. It was like I was constricted, wrapped up tightly with a ribbon, waiting for Draco to cut it so I could breathe again. 

I stared at myself in my mirror. Cracked—I was only cracked. I wasn't broken, I could still hold it all back, keep it hidden from the world. No one needs nor wants to see what I hide in my head, the emotions and feelings that are completely unnecessary. I told myself constantly that it was what most people did, that the ones who let everything out were nothing but weak. And I was not weak. 

Opal's face, when I told her I was leaving, was enough to break my heart in two. Her eyes began to water and rivers ran down her cheeks. I picked her up instantly and held her tight in my arms. She buried her head in my hair and sobbed loudly so I could feel even more guilty for leaving. Her small hands gripped onto the fabric of my school shirt, and her tiny nails scratched me in the process.

"It'll be alright Oppie, Mum and Dad are home now. And Cissy will visit," I told her in order for her to calm down.

"I'll come every day," Narcissa told Opal, though she directed it mainly towards me. 

It was her way of letting me know she would still be safe. Even if my parents did actually stay, Narcissa would come in and check on her regularly. I nodded my thanks to her and she smiled before rubbing comforting circles on Opal's back. It reminded me of Draco. And excitement suddenly found its way to my chest at the thought. 

"I have to go, Oppie," I whispered, causing her to sniffle into my hair. 

I walked her down to the living room, she wouldn't leave my hip, not even if I tried to put her down. Snape stood next to the fireplace impatiently, tapping his foot on the marble floors. My lip curled slightly as I saw my parents waiting there too, always there to say goodbye, but never there to say hello. They liked to make a good impression, and seen as though both Snape and Narcissa were there, it just wouldn't be right if they didn't say goodbye, would it?