alleyway [h.s]

chapter 33

*talk of child abuse in this chapter*

HARRY'S POV

The last few days have been crazy. Some have been the best moments of my life and others the worst.

My mind goes back to our one month, the first time a told Ruby that I love her, the day of our zoo date and making love in front of the fire place.

That was one of my new favourite memories with her. The entire day felt like a dream. I can still see the face she made when I gave her my gift. She was absolutely speechless.

The next day was when everything fell down. All I could feel was anger when I called Niall and he told me that Alice never made any plans  with Ruby. I felt betrayed by her because all we ever are to each other is honest. Not once have I lied to her. I completely exploded and waited for her to get back. I was worried sick about where she was but I couldn't really do anything about it.

It was only when I heard the front door open did my heart start to beat quicker then it already was. It sunk when I saw her face, the scratches and dried blood. My mind immediately went to Luca and I was right. My vision went red when the words left her mouth. I didn't even realize what was coming out of my mouth until I said it and saw the broken look on her face. I had to tell her how I felt about it all and the only way I can express my feelings when I'm pissed is to scream. I didn't expect her to leave though. I didn't mean it when I told her to get out of my face but she took it seriously and left me.

I felt like a terrible person and realized that I don't deserve a sweet girl like her. I should've controlled myself instead of yelling and going completely crazy and touching cocaine again.

When I woke up this morning after I held Ruby until she fell asleep, all I could think about was cocaine. I just about went crazy when I was downstairs alone. I woke up from Niall's dumb group chat and I didn't want to wake Ruby. She needed all the sleep she could get after what happened the night before. When I made it downstairs, I had a small panic attack because all I could think about was drugs. I searched everywhere for anything that I could take, I even went out it my car only to find my glove box completely empty. I was angry at first but I understood why the guys took it all away from me.

I went absolutely crazy in rage. Not only because Ruby lied to me but because she could've gotten hurt or possibly killed. I know that I should've been hugging her and grateful that she was alright but my mind went down a different path.

I sat on the couch for a good hour having a panic attack until I saw Ruby's name pop up on my phone. I immediately calmed down before I made my way up to her. Once I saw her beautiful face, my heart calmed down.

I enjoyed our shower together until we got that fucking message from the one person that ruins my mood. I'm not nervous about the robbery in general. I'm just nervous that Ruby has to be a part of it. During these things, we can't stick together. We have to split up and search the mansion that we're breaking into so we can get out as soon as we get what we're there for. I won't be able to keep my eyes on her the whole time.

The rest of the day went by smoothly. Everyone came over, the girls got their tattoos and we all had a late lunch together. The lunch was the funniest part. Getting to tease Ruby as she literally spat out her drink all over the table. She was embarrassed by the situation but was quick to forgive me when I gave her the best head anyone has ever get and fucked her and choked her against the shower wall. It drove me crazy that I couldn't kiss her though but I love that damn tattoo.

That brings me back to now, waiting by the back door for Ruby in my swimming trunks and towel hanging around my neck.

It's around 6pm right now and the sun is setting soon. I thought we could sit and relax in my hot tub. It's not too cold out but cold enough for me to start it up. I've never been in it with anyone else but the boys.