Lonely Hearts Meeting

Chapter 17 - Writing it Down

Taylor wants to tear her hair out in frustration. She's decided that today is the day she's going to start collecting her thoughts on everything, figure out how she's going to stand in front of a jury and fight for her life. Only now that she's sitting down to write it all out, she's drawing a blank. It's like she can't even remember anything properly and it's driving her insane. She lets out a loud groan before throwing her pen aggressively across the room before letting her head fall into her hands. It doesn't take long before she hears a knock on the bedroom door and just as she looks up - Joe's head is peeking around the door. 

"You alright in here?" He asks. She just sighs and shrugs, patting the spot on the floor next to her.  He plonks down beside her, looking around at the crumpled up paper scattered around on the floor. "Well love, it appears the paper outnumbers you." She laughs a little before resting her head on his shoulder.

"I can't figure out what to say." She mumbles. His arm snakes around her waist, gently tracing patterns on her hip with his thumb. 

"I think you're struggling now, but you'll know what to say when you get in there." She feels his lips on her cheek. 

"What if I don't though?" She bites her lip, it's a thought that's been nagging at her all week - which is why she's been putting it off. 

"You will. I believe in you, you're just scared now." A silence falls over them for a moment, Taylor doesn't really know what to say - she's feeling a little defeated. "C'mon." He takes her hand before standing up. She follows his lead, 

"What are we doing?" She asks as he walks them out of her bedroom. 

"Ice cream." Is all he says and she finds herself grinning. He sits her down at the kitchen table before coming back with a pint of ice cream and two spoons. 

"Where did this even come from?" She laughs as he passes her a spoon.

"I snuck it in the last shop we did. Figured we may need it over the coming weeks." She still struggles with her mind when it comes to food, but Joe's seemed to discover that snacking is the best way to deal with it - rather than expecting her to eat full meals. And he's an awfully good distraction. 

They dig into the ice-cream, chatting a little about the upcoming trial. 

"I'm just struggling to decide whether it's worth paying for a lawyer or letting the state issue me one. I mean, lawyers are expensive." She debates out loud - slightly curious on what his opinion is. 

"I'll pay for whenever lawyer Taylor, let's find the best one we can." She sighs, 

"I can't let you do that for me - I need to figure this one out myself. I got into this mess, I'm not going to make you pay for it." She feels him grab her hand and she can already tell he's going to fight her on this. 

"I have all this money, what's the use of it if I can't do this for you?" His eyes hold such a determination, he's so protective of her and she knows how willing he is to do these things. 

"I just feel weird taking your money, I don't have much of it myself...I don't know." 

"Let me do this, please? Let me do as much as I can to help you win, so you can have a normal life. So we can go back to London, or anywhere we want really." She sighs again, standing up and walking around the table to sit in his lap - her arms wound round his neck. She feels his hands on her hips and just feels softer. He's her comfort, and he's been here for her through all of this...maybe he's right, maybe she should let him help - besides, whether she wins or loses affects him to.

"Okay." She murmurs, can't help but smile as his whole face lights up. Suddenly, his lips are on hers, kissing her deeply. He pulls her closer, extending their kiss. They haven't gone further than kissing yet, she just isn't ready. The wounds Adam had inflicted on her when it comes to that department haven't quite healed and the last thing she wants is to freeze up in a moment like that. They haven't talked about it though, but Joe seems to be letting her take the lead on that - he knows about her trauma surrounding it and she's been grateful for that. She allows herself to enjoy their kiss for a few more moments before pulling back, not wanting to get carried away. Their breathing is laboured and she smiles at him, kissing his cheek before climbing off his lap.