Trust Takes Moments to Break, But Time to Create

28-Felix

My heart stops short. 

I'm completely stunned as the words Marinette just uttered bounce around the inside of my skull. 

I was akumatized?

I should have known the moment I heard the name Chat Blanc, but I suppose in my befuddled mine, I believed it could have been another variation of Copycat or Antibug.

How?

Then it hits me. The one situation that made Marinette or Ladybug worried when it came to our relationship as partners was our identities and the priority for them to remain secret. Especially after one particular meeting we had on a rooftop, watching the sunset. All Ladybug had said was 'I did it.' She never got around explaining what she meant by that. Could it be that our reveal caused my downfall? 

"Felix?" I simply stare at her, trying to comprehend the new information. "You fought me? When was this incident?" Her eyes find the floor. She messes with her fingers nervously, a habit that comes out when she's anxious or nervous. Her body is tensed, as if she was defensive. My heart clenches at the fear that seems to be radiating off of her. A guarded fear. 

The kind of fear that only those who truly know Marinette can see. She starts speaking, and it seems to be the catalyst as she begins to ramble, unable to stop.

"It was a long time ago. I had told you afterwards that I did it before we watched the sunset in silence on a rooftop, and I was referring to devilizing your akumatized state. Paris was nothing but rubble under what seemed to be an endless ocean. Only you remained, stark white, your eyes not the normal gray blue but icy and cold. You called me Marinette, even though I was transformed. You said our loved destroyed the world. I tried to speak with you like a civilized person, but things got violent and ugly. You weren't yourself, but more of a feral cat like killer. I nearly died if I hadn't gotten away utilizing the water. Underneath the surface, there was nothing but debris and two statues that fell to ash as soon as I touched them. One was Hawkmoth and the other was me. You were a rogue akumatized victim that had run rampant. Bunnyx never told me how our reveal created the end of the world, but I had assumed you were disappointed in my identity. I thought that if Hawkmoth ever was defeated, then it would be safer to reveal, or not reveal at all. I never thought-" I break her ramble with a kiss, effectively stopping her words. 

"Never call yourself a disappointment Marinette. You are far from that." Her lip quivers ever so slightly as she nods. I caress her cheek, a gesture she leans into. Peering into her bluebell eyes, I can only see worry and another aspect that she's hidden away from so many. She looks older, much older than she really is. As if she lived for eons but remained in a sixteen-year-old body. The trauma that is obviously there since the event, has taken its toll. 

She looks so, tired. 

"You've had to carry the whole world on your shoulders, haven't you?" Her eyes lowering is an answer enough, as I hug her fiercely, wanting to convey every ounce of my extreme care, concern, admiration, and love for her. "I promise you; you are not alone, not anymore. I am here for you, I have always been here for you, and I will be, now and forever." She pulls back a little, our foreheads touching, looking at me, her eyes glassy with fought back tears. When she speaks, her voice is barely a whisper but it's enough for me to hear due to our closeness.

"You can't promise forever Chaton."

"Every day of my life then. I promise you; we are in this together. Us against the world right Milady?" I hold out my fist, the same manner as our usual gesture after a victory against an akuma. It's childish, but it has not prevented us from continuing the tradition since we received the mantel of holders of creation and destruction. She takes a deep breath, before smiling and bumping her fist with mine. However, before she can pull away, I interlace our fingers together, pulling her into my embrace, properly kissing her. She reciprocates the gesture, and this is not gentle or soft, but fierce and passionate. 

As if we know that we might not be able to kiss like this again. 

As if we know that this meeting will change our lives forever. 

As if we know this might be the last time we are allowed to be like this, not heroes, but lovers. 

This angelic woman, my good luck, my other half, my partner and confidant, is the best thing that could ever happen to me. 

Oh Mother, you would love her. She reminds me of you on a daily basis, but also has her own personality. This caring, selfless woman who brings me such happiness and love. 

Oh Marinette, my darling little bug, how much I love you. 

How much I love you.