A rewrite that is edited for mostly grammar and spelling.
(This is a Platonic Bill x Reader x Oc) Sometimes the person who smiles the brightest hurts the most. Join Y/n, who is Mabel and Dipper's older sister that joins them when they go to stay wit...
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~Episode opens where "Weirdmageddon 2: Escape From Reality" left off.~
Dipper, Mabel, Soos, and Wendy: *Run into the Mystery Shack* "Yaaahh!!" Celestabellebethabelle, Chutzpar, Bats Biker, Woodpecker guy, Candy, Stan Pines, Grenda, Sheriff Blubs, Pacifica, Old Man McGucket, Nathan, and some Gnomes: "Yaaaahhhh!!" Dipper: "Wait." Dipper and Mabel: "Grunkle Stan!" *Run to him* Stan: "Kids! I can't believe it! I thought I lost you two!" Soos: *Hugs Stan* "Mr. Pines! It's really you! I've been hugging strangers to practice for this moment." Wendy: *Slams into Stan for a hug* "We missed you, you old codger!" Stan: *Chuckles* "I've missed you knuckleheads, too. It's good to have you back." Dipper: "So...what's everyone doing here?" Gasps as some Lilliputtians run past him. Mabel: "Yeah there's like monsters and gnomes, and is Pacifica wearing a potato sack?" Pacifica: "Hey! Even in a sack I still look better than you." Multi-Bear: "It's...it's a long story." Wax Larry King: *In the vents* "Hey, is anyone gonna feed me? Larry King's disembodied wax head wants num-nums." Grenda: "We're trying to ration our food, remember? (As Wax Larry King chews on her hair) Uhhh...it's happening again." Multi-bear closes the vents. Pituitaur: (Looking out the door) "Hey, everyone! Eye-bat!" Everyone gasps. Gnome: "Evasive maneuvers!" Stan: *Slams the door and grabs Dipper and Mabel* "Shhh, keep it down." The refugees scatter. Gnome: "Hit the lights!" Outside, an eye-bat turns a scampering raccoon into stone and flies off with it.
Stan: (Lights a match and throws it into a can, illuminating the shack, revealing the people sitting around the room) "Welcome to what's left of normal around here. Home base." The screen pans across the various people hiding in the Mystery Shack. Toby Determined: *As a gnome pulls a dart out of him* "Ow!" Greggy C.: "We have..." Sev'ral Timez: (Singing:) "Several injuries! (Clutch their injuries) Oh, ow..." Chubby Z.: "Ow, my liver, girl!" Dipper: "Ah! Rumble McSkirmish?" Rumble: "Do not be afraid. Weirdmageddon has taught me, there are some battles I cannot win. I am now Humble McSkirmish." (A digital "-50 despair" pops up next to Rumble) Mabel: "Grunkle Stan, how'd this all happen?" Stan: "So I was hammering signs out back when the sky started vomiting nightmares. I listen to a lot of AM radio so I knew what this meant: the end of the world. (Flashback of Stan running inside as the weirdness wave descends) What I didn't expect was what happened next. (The totem pole comes to life and attempts to attack the house, but hits a dome around it) Turns out whatever you and my brother did to the shack with your unicorn voodoo made the crazy place invincible to weirdness." (The totem pole falls over; cut back to the present.) Dipper: "Of course, the unicorn spell. That's why this is the only place Bill's magic can't touch." Stan: (Gesturing to Old Man McGucket) "That's when Possum Breath over here shows up leading a bunch of injured stragglers through the forest. They needed a place to stay and since the mayor got captured, I elected myself de facto chief. The plan's to stay in here and eat Brown Meat until we run out, then I vote we eat the gnomes." Jeff: "Hey! I'm short, not deaf!" Stan: "Shh! Shh! Stress will make you chewy." Dipper: "Grunkle Stan, we can't all just hide inside the Shack. There's a town in need of saving. Me and Ford tried to do it, but he got captured by Bill." Stan: (Opens can of The Brown Meat) "Serves that jerk right. My brother's had some stupid plans, but going up against an all-powerful space demon was his worst one yet. Trust me, we have everything we need right here. (Sits down on a wooden lounge chair surrounded by the Multi-Bear and gnomes) It's not the Ritz but at least the monsters inside know how to massage. (To the Multi-Bear:) You know Shiatzu?" Multi-Bear: "Yes, I've taken some classes." Dipper: "So you're really just gonna let Bill win?" Stan: "Look, kiddo. We got a good deal here. Besides, I'm sure wherever the rest of the townsfolk are, they're fine." (Slams his hand down, accidentally hitting the remote and turning on the TV). Shandra Jimenez (On the TV:) "This is Shandra Jimenez reporting live from the inside of Bill's castle. Here for the first time are images of what's happened to the captured townsfolk. Viewers are advised to look away if they don't want to see their friends turned into a twisted throne of human agony." Pacifica: "Mom and Dad?" Wendy: "My family!" Sheriff Blubs: "Deputy Durland!" Shandra: "Is there no one who will save the people of this town? I'm Shandra Jimenez and I'm being turned into stone by a flying eyeball." (The TV turns to static) Everyone gasps. Pacifica: "Oh, no. My parents are bad but even they don't deserve to be turned to stone." Sheriff Blubs: (Drops down on his knees) "Curse you, Bill! Why must you take everything we love?" (Rips his shirt open and cries) Mabel: (Climbing on top of the Multi-Bear) "Guys, don't you see? Our friends need us, but we can only save them if we fight back." (Pulls Dipper up after her) Dipper: "Mabel is right. Bill wants us to run and hide. He wants us to think he's invincible. But Ford told me before he was captured that he knows Bill's secret weakness." The refugees perk up and start muttering. Wendy: "Weakness?" Dipper: "Now, if we band together, if we combine all of our strength, our smarts, our...whatever Toby has..." Toby: "Various rashes!" Dipper: "...then we just might be able to rescue Ford, learn Bill's weakness, and save Gravity Falls!" Everyone cheers. Stan: "Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Have you all forgotten who's in charge here? Besides, we're only safe inside! It's not like we can take the Mystery Shack to Bill." McGucket: "Wha--Whoa! Holy hootenany! Flapjack and fiddlebanjos! Sorry, Sorry. Got a little excited. (Thumps his foot and slaps his knee) What I meant to say is I think I figured out a way to fight Bill and rescue Ford. But we're all gonna have to work together. (Snaps his fingers and a gnome puts glasses on him) Now. You just..." Dipper, Mabel, Soos, Wendy, and McGucket: *Talk unintelligibly* Soos: "Don't worry, Ford! We're coming for you!"
