"So, What do you think?" I asked Miles as we approached the table.
"They're great."
"Oh, Come on!" I sat beside Sadie. "You can do better than that. what did you like about them? How're they different than what you thought? Which song you-"
"Wanna dance?" Sadie interrupted. "Otherwise she's gonna ask you a thousand more questions."
Miles looked at me then at the dance floor.
"Uh, you kids go have fun," I got up and made a wide gesture of hands while making way for Sadie.
They locked hands and disappeared into the human ocean.
"I don't think Luca recognized me!" I told Miriam who was sitting across from me.
"What?" She was daydreaming about the blond guy two tables down.
"I'm sure he wouldn't show it even if he did recognize you," Dahlia said.
"Why not?" I asked.
"Because," Miriam started. "Wait, did you ask Miles out tonight to make Luca jealous?"
"What?" This was insane. "Of course not. And Emm, please don't say it like it's a date."
"But you thought it could be, that's why you dragged us all here." Miriam had to always be so perceptive.
It wasn't a question so I didn't reply instead I sat back and listened to the songs as they slowed down and the crowd scattered leaving only a few people on the dance floor, none of which were Miles or Sadie. Where the hell were they? I swear to god if they're making out or something I will rip Sadie a new one. The trouble of having hot friends who are great at flirting is you absolutely cannot introduce them to your crush.
I had to find Miles before anything happened.
Searching around took longer than I anticipated so I forfeited, retreating to our table. And I found them, there!
Sadie was practically sitting in Miles's lap and they had somehow acquired a guitar. How amazing!
I sat down and waited for an in to participate in the conversation.
"I don't know, Nora's been bugging us to get a drummer for months now," Sadie said before her eyes fell on me. Then she abruptly got up and almost sent the guitar flying if it wasn't for Miles who caught it mid-air.
"You all promised we'd do at least one rock album. It's been over a decade," I said looking around the table at my friends and bandmates. "When are you gonna do good on your word?"
"We just said we would, to stop you bitching about it," Miriam very unhelpfully provided. "Because rock is so lame and pretty much dead."
Did she just say that? In front of Miles?
"And Folk isn't lame?" I tried to give Miriam a signal to watch her mouth considering we had a guest. "And or, dead?"
"Let's not forget that we all suck at anything other than Folk and we pretty much don't have a choice." Dahlia so kindly reminded us.
"We were teenagers!" I almost shouted. "We can do so much better now. And... And Miles can help, too. Right?" I looked at Miles pleading.
The whole table went silent.
"It's been a long–"
"Surely if I–"
Miles and Miriam looked at each other apologetic for cutting off the other.
"Mi agreed to drop by next Thursday," Sadie said finishing her drink. "Best talk about it then. It has been a long night."
Did she just call Miles, Mi? How did they get so friendly so fast? I opened my mouth to protest, but everyone was getting up indicating the end of the discussion.
As far as miracles go, the short distance between Miles's apartment and mine was certainly divine intervention which allowed me to have a late-night, forty-minute walk with him.
"So, you liked them?" I asked, unable to think of anything more conversational.
"Yes. You've got great friends."
"I was talking about the band," I chuckled. "But we can totally do a friend review!"
"I'd rather not," Miles said looking ahead.
"Then, what do you want to talk about?"
"Sadie said you just moved to LA," he said. "Why?"
I shrugged but he probably didn't see it as I was a few steps behind. "I felt like a change."
"Boy trouble?"
I did not expect that! Or how loud my laugh sounded, maybe it was the echo of the narrow alleyway we had turned to. Nevertheless, I was laughing hard and that deprivation of oxygen drove me to stop and lean back against a wall trying to catch my breath.
My laugh was contagious. Soon Miles was leaning against the same wall right beside me, so close that our shoulders brushed. And when I stopped holding my stomach and let my hand fall to my side between us, I felt the coolness of his two rings and the warmth of his knuckles against mine. It felt like a lightning bolt, helped me gain enough control to say "I've had more boy trouble in the past couple of weeks than all the other years of my life combined."
"So you moved here for a guy?"
"Nah," I said. "Just a happenstance."
I was looking at him, looking for a sign. There was a little blush. Maybe I should say more. Maybe this is the right time to let him know.
I opened my mouth.
Sadie had called him 'Mi'.
It was too dark.
They had held hands.
I closed my mouth.
He was probably drunk.
He was looking at me expectantly.
That little pink on his cheeks meant nothing. This walk meant nothing. This world was a scrambled mess of words and happenings so hopeful people can make a sign out of anything.
I have only seen him a couple of times. I know nothing. I'm just a fan. This is not...
"We should," Miles looked away like he knew the moment was gone, too. "It's already late."
"Right."
The rest of our walk was quiet, uncomfortable. I wished I had never met him. I wished I never moved to LA, never signed that contract.
I didn't know what I wanted, but this wasn't it. This was a twisted version of what I had wished for, and isn't that just how the world works?
