The Night I Was Saved

Chapter Forty-Seven

Her fingers are laced around my thumb, her eyes wide and curious as she looks at Hero as he wipes the cotton stick against the inside of her cheek. She doesn't move; it's remarkable how still she stays put given how she's discovering how to move her arms and legs more and more.

Hero is concentrating hard even though the task isn't difficult. He hasn't looked at me once, his eyes are solely on Daisy, and I know it's because he doesn't know how to feel at this moment.

He told me just before he started taking the sample. He hates that there needs to be one, but at the same time he wanted to do it because he didn't want to burden Daisy too much.

I know that Daisy doesn't care. She is too small to even notice what is happening, let alone by who. But it was important to Hero that he took the swap, just like he wanted to do it at home instead of at the station.

"There you go, love," he mumbles as he takes the stick from her mouth. He then immediately seals it, making sure nothing comes into contact with the sample before he takes off the white gloves. After he's thrown them on the table, he reaches for Daisy, taking her from me and hugging her against his chest.

The sight makes me smile and it replaces the heavy feeling from moments ago slightly. "Nothing will change," I weakly promise him again, even though I know that the swap will change some things. "Nothing that is important to us," I correct myself when I see his expression.

Hero hums, pressing his lips against Daisy's head. "The rage is already unbearable now," he quietly admits. "Let alone when I know who it is for sure."

"But it will make sure they'll get the punishment they deserve."

A humorless chuckle leaves his throat. "They don't deserve the comfort of a thin mattress and three meals a day." His eyes then switch to me, his expression serious. "I dreamed about them last night."

"You did?" I ask to which he nods. And just when I wat to ask what the dream was about, he already tells me himself.

"I killed them. In my dream, I made sure they got the only punishment they deserve. And you know what?" He swallowed visibly, and I try to hide the surprise that was caused by his unexpected confession.

"What?" I'm almost afraid to ask it, but at the same time, I know he'll tell me anyway, even if I wouldn't want to know.

"I didn't feel guilty. If anything, it felt good." He swallows again, this time clearly in disgust as he shakes his head. "That's not the person I am. It's not the person I was before I met you."

He sounds disappointed, and because of it, the only thing that comes to mind as reaction is an apology. "I'm sorry."

His gaze on me stays the same, almost as if he didn't hear me. "There is this persistent, protective urge that rushes through my veins, an even greater one than the rage that I feel too. And it's getting bigger and bigger. More consuming with each day."

He looks at Daisy again while shaking his head. I can tell he's wrapped his arms around her even tighter, and she seems to welcome it because her head drops to his shoulder as her tiny fingers find her mouth. The moment she starts to suck, her eyes flutter closed, oblivious to how tensed Hero seems to me.

"I want to protect you two," he softly continues, his cheek dropping to Daisy's head. "Ever since I met you and Dais, I have this need to protect both of you. But it's getting bigger and heavier with each day. And now that Dais grows..." He shakes his head, his complexion white as a sheet. "I realize that I won't be able to protect her from everything, but that thought is giving me panic attacks, Jo."

He bows his head again, closing his eyes and pressing his nose against Daisy's head. I know exactly how he feels. I want to protect her too. The thought of anything happening to her -even a scratch or bruise- makes me sick to my stomach.