A Friendship To Keep (une amitié à garder)

VACANT HEART

After reading the letter, Georges went inside his house and straight to the living room. He sat in the couch comfortably. He saw his mom coming for him and seated next to him. Georges' mom congratulated him acknowledging his awards in the prize-awarding on his school. She kissed Georges' cheeks like what a mom would do for her baby. They suddenly talked about the prize-awarding. That day, July of 14th, the day of heaven and hell, the death of his friend. His mother talked about how welcoming the fathers are. The nuns are very generous and the students are very polite. That was a great choice of school. She said. His mom asked, "How was your experience? Have you met anyone? Some friends and companions?". Georges eyes got bigger as if he was in a state of shock. Everything was recalled in his mind. The letters that had never been read, the train, the news and the tears. He felt his breathe getting heavy again. Small tears are forming behind his eyes. He was trying to keep it up and not burst, not release any emotions and keep a straight face. No matter how hard he tried, his eyes were already telling the story to his mom. He couldn't speak because once he said a word, everything will follow. Everything will let out of his chest and his body. His grief will be uncovered and he might lose control of his self. Georges, on the other hand, cannot leave his mom without a word. He tried to say something but he stuttered. "Yes mom, it was wonderful". Finally, after Georges let those words out, he ran upstairs and went to his room and locked the door. His mom heard the locking of the door and thought, she'll give him a time for his self, some lone time.

Inside Georges' room, you can hear him crying, laying in his chest. His mood changed so quickly. He's heavy feelings carried him again. He cried under the pillow. The pillowcase filled with tears. At that time, he showed no strength and courage and just lets his feelings out. Out of his chest, the storm started again. Alexandre, the school, the priests and everything associated with Alexandre's death that made Georges grief, it was all brought back to his memory. He's screaming "Alex.. Alexandre! ALEXANDRE!!" under the pillow. His emotions led him to bite the pillow as to control his grieving. He felt his chest gasping for air and beating so strong. As he recalls what happened in the prize-awarding, his soul started to drown in a bowl of tears. Georges felt again, everything he felt on that day. The realization came through. The words and last moments, he never had with him. The last sight of him alive wasn't even made special and romantic enough to be presented as the last moment. He wept loudly under the cover of his pillows and his mattress. He's scratching his bedsheets so aggressively. Georges, haven't really moved on yet. He wasn't even near to acceptance. He's in the stage of in denial. Poor Georges, wept for almost half an hour, reminiscing that day, the most unspecial special day.

He got to calm himself down and breath heavily. His chest then hurt so bad, so as his head. He's trying to massage his chest but his reminiscing did not helped, instead, his massaging became a smash to his chest. Rather massaging it, he punched his chest letting his emotions control him. The action was severe and was caused by a sudden appearance of core memory that leads to an uncontrollable rage. He couldn't handle his self and his chest seems to explode. Georges was gasping for air and trying to call for help. No voice was coming out of his mouth because he doesn't have enough air and even he shouted, the sound wouldn't reach his mom since everything is closed in his room. As he gasped for air, he started losing energy. His last energies were spent in getting Alexandre's picture in his cabinet leaving the cabinet open. He went back to his bed and the only thing that came to his mind is that he's finally gonna follow Alexandre's path. He started to lose sight, then actions, and now, consciousness. Georges, alone in his locked room, holding Alexandre's picture in his chest, fainted.