Playing Games

Just Friends

The next morning, I wake up slightly hungover and head to the bathroom. I stared at the mirror and wiped the excess mascara that made its way down my cheeks from last night. I decided a nice hot shower would help me out somewhat so I hop in, rinsing away the sadness and starting fresh. I slip on a pair of high-wasted black jeans, a dark grey tank top and braid my hair into two French braids on either side of my head. I threw on some platform converse and sprayed myself with my perfume. Once I was finished getting dressed, I threw on a minimal amount of makeup and went downstairs.

It was around 9:30am by the time I got down and the house was spotless. You wouldn't have known that a part was thrown here just hours before. I walk into the kitchen seeing a very hungover Adam attempting to make a cup of coffee and Christine sitting on one of the barstool scrolling through her phone. "Good morning, lovebirds" I say with a yawn as I head over to Adam to steal the cup of coffee he had just poured. "Thanks, bro" I said with a wink. "You know Sof, stealing a hungover man's coffee is punishable by death" he says as he grabs another mug from the cabinet. "But I suppose ill let it slide, only this once" he finished. I let out a giggle and sat next to Christine.

"Morning, love. How did you sleep" she says glancing up at my from her screen. "I slept alright, thanks," I lied. "What about you two, you sleep okay" I asked suggestively. "Excellent, actually. Adam and I drank way too much and passed out as soon as we hit the sheets" Christine said with a laugh. "We'll just have to finish what we started tonight then huh," Adam whispered loudly into Christines ear. I fake gagged at his comment and they both laughed.

"Good morning my beautiful people!" Smitty yelled as he walked through the kitchen. We all said our hellos and good mornings as the rest of the group eventually made their way into the kitchen. Nick and I share a glance, and he gives me a tight-lipped smile, obviously remembering the events of last night. I brush it off, attempting to not let the thought of Austin get to me anymore. I scanned the room not seeing the one person I was looking for. Jay noticed his absence as well and asks, "Where's sleeping beauty at?"referring to Austin, "Still passed out I'm guessing?" Smitty responds as he places a perfectly rolled joint in between his lips, "nah man, I guess Taylor blew up his phone last night. I wouldn't be surprised if he's still taking to her." "Ah shit. He's still wrapped up with that craziness?" Jay asks. "It seems he can't escape from her. She's got such a fucking chokehold on the guy, pussy can't be that good" Smitty says and the group laughs, except for me.

The group continues on with casual conversation as I excuse myself and go out back to get some fresh air. I walk over to the chairs that were over by the edge where the view is and sat down, cradling my hot coffee in my hands. I tried to clear my head from the thoughts from last night. I had no idea how messed up I still was because of Connor. I thought I had finally moved on from that trauma, but I haven't been in a relationship with anyone since. Austin was the first man that I actually considered to potentially date, since Connor. I thought I'd be ready to move on, but I was terrified of what could happen.

As I was enjoying the view, I couldn't help the feeling of being stared at so I looked around. Nobody. Weird. I take a sip of my coffee once more as I watch birds fly high above me. Watching as they flew over, my eyes drifted to the balcony that overlooks the backyard, that I had not noticed before. Standing on that balcony was Austin; cigarette in hand, shirtless, revealing all of his tattoos and a pair of heather grey sweatpants that hung dangerously low on his hips. Fuck. I thought to myself. I raise my mug up to him to acknowledge his presence and he nods his head as he takes another drag of his cigarette. I look away and he disappears into the doors of his room. I didn't want things to be awkward with us. I needed to be straight up and tell him I am not interested in him and last night was a mistake. Only that would be lying, Sofia. My damn thoughts always trying to convince me otherwise. Whatever, this needed to be done.

As I continue to argue myself I feel the seat beneath me sink as a very familiar scent of tobacco and woody musk snaps me out of my thoughts. Here we go, Sofia. "Morning" I said barely above a whisper, taking a sip of my now cold coffee. "Good morning, sweetheart" he said with his raspy morning voice. Keep yourself together... We sat there in a comfortable silence, waiting for each other to break the tension. "Look, I'm sorry about last night" he said, running his fingers through his unruly, short hair. "No, no, its okay. I'm sorry" I said looking down at my lap. "Why are you apologizing" he says with an amused smile, "you did nothing wrong." He's now facing towards me, trying to get me to look up at him, which I do. "I should apologize because I got way too drunk and didn't even ask if you were in a relationship or whatever, but its okay. I didn't mean to lead you on or anything like that" I lied. I desperately wanted something between us to work out but he couldn't know. He's got way too much to deal with now, and I don't want to burden him anymore. "Oh" he says softly, "do you- are you saying you regret last night?" His face falls into a sad but serious one. "No! Not at all, I don't regret last night at all! All I'm saying is that you got your shit to figure out and so do I, I guess" I say placing my hand on top of his. He only nods in response. "Can I ask you a question" he asks. "Yeah, of course," I say eagerly waiting for what he was going to say. "I felt something between you and I. Am I crazy or did you feel something too" he asks not taking his eyes away from mine. I couldn't lie to him about this. "I, uh. Ye- yeah. I felt something. I don't know what it was really but... yeah" I said biting my lip.

He brings his hand up to my face and pulls on my chin slightly, causing my lip to pop back out of my mouth. His hand lingers as I am unable to break away from his intense gaze. He opens his mouth as he's going to say something but quickly closes it. He then takes his hand from my face and grabs a cigarette from his pack. He then clears his throat and looks at me once more, "So, I guess it might be better for us to just be friends then, huh?" I look at my lap again and then back up to those mesmerizing baby blues. "Yeah, I'd like that" I said back, standing up. He pulls me into a hug and we sit there for a minute. Once we break apart, he looks at me "I'm tired of my relationships with people being so fucking complicated, you know. I just want things to be easy." "I agree," I say bringing my empty cup up to cheers with him. "Here's to uncomplicated friendships" he says. I clink with his cup and think to myself, this is going to be anything but uncomplicated.