Before I officially get into this chapter I wanted to give a little insight.
This chapter is not, I repeat is not, intended to offend anyone.
This chapter is written as a view into my future. I understand that people will have different views and not everyone is going to agree with my views on some of this things, but if you do read further I hope it's approached with an open mind.
Now I do not plan on having children in the future, but if I am blessed with carrying children, I will try my hardest at being the best parent I can be, because I can fail at a lot of things, but I refuse to fail my future children. I wrote this to look back if children do happen to be in my future, it's a way to remind myself I was once young and naive and sometimes the only thing a kid needs most is the affection of a parent.
Dear future baby,
First off let me say, I'm happy you came into my life, and I don't ever want you to doubt that. I'm going to cry tears of joy when I hold you, and I vow to watch over you 24/7. I want you to know you're not alone, and our bond will be extra strong since you did spend 9 months in my tummy.
In those 9 months we learned together, and grew together. I heard you when you wanted certain foods and felt you when you refused others. I felt you wiggle and saw you as a little dot on a screen. Hopefully the relationship we had as we grew and learned while together will help us build a bond that will always keep us together.
I want you to remember that this is my first time doing something like this, and I'll learn as you do too. I want you to know, that I'll love you, and try to make you happy as long as I can. I want you to know that no matter what the situation is, you can come to me, and open up. I want you to know nothing is off boundaries and if we have a disagreement, we'll solve it over cookies and ice cream.
I want you to know I was a kid/teenager/ beginning adulthood at one point, and I understand how cruel the world can be. I want you to know that I don't care if you're gay, lesbian, bi, transgender, or just down right confused. I will love and accept you every step of the way, because this little thing doesn't change who you are or the fact that you are part of me. I don't want you to feel like you have done anything wrong by only being yourself, and I refuse to be your first bully by making you feel otherwise.
I understand that when you become a teenager you will want/ or feel the need to hide things from me. Just know, I will find out every secret, and I'd rather hear it from you than someone else. I understand we might have an argument every now and then, but I don't want you thinking I hate you or I don't care about you, because you are the most precious thing to me.
If you want to change your appearance to help find the "real" you, just know I'll be there telling you what's flattering and hand you outfits to try on. I want you to try everything till you're comfortable and know what makes you unique.
I want you to know, that when I do "give you away", it will be because I know you're in love and gonna be happy. But I also want you to know I probably put your significant other through hell before he/she was allowed to elope with the most important thing to me.
When choosing a career, I want you to know as long as it's not illegal, I'll stand behind you no matter how outrageous it sounds to others. As long as I know it will make you happy and you're willing to commit I'll be willing to do the same. I don't want to push you to college when the time comes. I want you to choose if that's what you want, the only thing I will push you to do is get a job so you can get experience to move up the ladder.
When and if you decide you want to join a religion, I will be in church with you, even though I don't believe in any religion (I do believe in God). I'll do it because it makes you happy which will result in me being happy. And if religion isn't in your plans, I hope you know that's okay too, no matter if others say differently.
I want you to grow to love and accept me the same, no matter how crazy I get sometimes. I know I'm not perfect, so please just remember that when I say or do something wrong. At the end of the day I'll still love and cherish you as much as I did when I laid my eyes on you. I don't want you to be afraid to talk to me about what's going on in you're life, or what you have planned in your future. And if kids are part of your future, I want you to spread the same message to them so they know that whenever they feel alone they're not. They have a wonderful parent who learned from experience that even though parenting is hard, the rewards that come along are worth it.
Love now and always,
Your future mommy.
