Jily oneshots

Isn't it neat?

by sunaprincess7

"Does anyone have any primer?" Lily yelled to the dressing room behind her, "I'm out of my FX."

"Here," Mary yelled back amongst the throng of girls, chucking Lily her Smashbox version over the heads of Emmeline and Dorcas who both ducked.

"This'll work?" Lily confirmed doubtfully, knowing that she didn't really have any other option as she squirted the clear gel into her palm.

"Nothing is going to work in this heat, Lil," Mary replied, now slathering her face with foundation. "But it'll stay on for at least 6 hours. Then you might need to reapply."

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, I hate this fucking dress," Marlene, who was by far the most ready of any of them, moaned as she tugged the bright yellow taffeta monstrosity up around her hips.

"Hey, at least yours hasn't got sleeves," Dorcas retorted, from next to Lily, still in the process of pinning an auburn wig with pigtails onto her head.

"Oh please, you practically begged McGonagall to give you Anna!" Marlene replied, now pulling the dress up around her arms.

"It was winter then!" Dorcas said miserably, grabbing a matte mauve lipstick out of her makeup bag.

"Can we all just be happy that none of us is Minnie?" Mary inserted, in between violently attacking her face with a beauty blender.

The group of girls murmured in approval.

"Technically, you should be the happiest out of everyone, Lil," Emmeline said, running a brush through her black wig as she puffed up the bun. "Sometimes they let you go out in a bikini."

"Hey, none of you have ever worn that tail," Lily replied, as she leaned into the mirror to draw on her eyebrows. "It's heavy as hell. It might be worse than the dress. And they haven't let me wear it in ages."

"I think they figured out you were making all the dads a little too happy in that purple excuse for a bra," Mary said lowly, causing their whole dressing room to laugh.

"Men are such trash," Emmeline added.

"Speaking of trash, aren't you meeting your new Eric today?" Marlene asked as she pulled white elbow gloves up over her arms.

"Later on tonight," Lily said, "after the parade. And if he's anything like the previous one, I think I might quit."

Lily's previous Eric had been the epitome of trash and was exactly who Marlene was referring to when she'd asked the question. Dave, or Prince Fuckboy as he was better known to the group, had spent his entire 6 months with the cast showing up late, being rude and, worst of all, sleeping his way through the Princess lineup.

After sleeping with Marlene, he'd made his way around Elsa, Tinkerbell and Jasmine, which was the unfortunate reason Bertha, Florence and Emma no longer sat with the rest of the girls. That drama had continued for at least a month until Prince Fuckboy realised everyone hated him and had quit.

"Apparently he's a friend of Hook's," Dorcas told them.

"Hook?" Emmeline, who was the most recent addition to the cast, asked. "I don't think I've met him."

"Sirius Black," Dorcas replied, as Lily smiled to herself, knowing that Dorcas's usual rant about Sirius was coming. "And you don't want to meet him. He's totally method," she continued, placing an unusual amount of disdain on the word method, "and speaks in a ridiculous English accent the entire time he's here, even on breaks, and challenges everyone to duels all day. Fucking idiot."

Lily couldn't help but giggle. She was actually rather fond of Sirius's approach to his work and suspected it had nothing to do with his devotion to acting but rather because he loved pretending to be a pirate all day.