Those Willing to Drown | Beiguang x GN! Reader

ARC III-ACT I

CW: lying and gaslighting (?)

When morning came and your eyes were rudely pried open by the glaring light of the sun through a small, annoying gap between two curtains, your body was overcome with a jolt of pain.

A low groan vibrated through you, hands shooting up to rub your eyes. Each muscle ached and twitched, begging to stretch further than what the small, comfortable wooden bed let you.

Wait- bed?

Shooting up, you took a long look at your surroundings. Unfamiliarity running down your spine. You were almost certain you didn't have enough money to afford a hotel - nor a motel for that matter - so how exactly are you here? Surrounded by maps of the world and small decorations of nations you had not been to.

It wasn't until you put two and two together (aka your shirtless chest and the sound of another person's breathing) that you remembered the events of the night before.

Out of all things to have happened after escaping Snezhnaya, sleeping with the captain of the ship that gave you home even if just for a few days. You couldn't help but feel guilt overcome you as you folded your legs into your chest and hid your face in your hands.

Beidou needed someone, but were you stable enough to be that someone for her? You wanted to be, you really did! Beidou was strong and confident, smart and funny, she was beautiful both inside and out, but what were you?

You were an escapee from your country - a traitor to your mother land - you were in a constant inner battle within yourself as to what your next move should be, and whether that move was smart, or safe. Wanted across nation borders, you were a dead person walking - your death would be inevitable eventually as the blade of the cryo archon would one day take your life and everything you grew to love.

It's why you left Melina after all, for promising the life of another is much easier than promising your own life. If you left now you could redirect all of your attackers away from them, allow them to live a life you wish you could have, a life you wish you could share with them. Perhaps helping the traveler was your doom.

Shifting of blankets snapped you out of your train of thought, fingers twitching to part and let you take a peek at the woman beside you. "Good morning."

White blankets hugged onto her every curve giving her a gentle glow as she turned and stretched her arms over her head. Shoulders flushed red and pink circular marks around her collarbone area - a sight that made you shift against the bed. Slowly, she sat up, long brown hair flowing close up behind her.

She turned to you and smiled, adjusting her eye patch to sit over her eye properly. "Good morning to you too. Feel any better?"

"Sorry?" You tilted your head in confusion.

She laughed, lifting her arms and moving all her hair away from her back to rest on her shoulder instead. You couldn't help but trail your eyes over the exposed skin.

"Yesterday you said you were always feeling stressed over your job, remember? That's why we did this, so you could feel more relieved."

"What? No I didn't." You scoffed, turning your body to the girl fully. "You said that you wanted me to prove how much I cared about you, that's why we did this."

"No offence but I'm more than capable of handling my own insecurities, I would never ask someone else to help me with them." She frowned as if offended at the mere thought of her ever being vulnerable. Slowly, her expression relaxed though. "If you're just worried don't. I wanted this too anyway, I'm just glad you had a reason to."

For a second, you both sat in silence. Was that true? You asked for this? It's weird, the memory of Beidou nearly crying in your arms after being rejected the first time almost clear in your mind - but you drank. Maybe the alcohol played into your perception of reality. Slowly, you watched the memory of her pouting lips becoming fuzzier and fuzzier.