Demoralized

Chapter 15

His lips are on mine, and all of a sudden the room is too hot and I'm not getting enough oxygen. He kisses me, and I'm suffocating in the shock. My eyes are wide open, and I feel an icy panic creeping up my spine.

I try to kiss back, but it just feels wrong.

I pull away from him, pressing my hands against his. "Harry.." I manage to rasp out.

His eyes flicker open, and a look of confusion and disappointment covers his face. He's frozen in place for a few seconds before rapidly getting up from his seat and shuffling backward to increase the space between us. "I'm sorry. I, uh, I don't know what happened." He awkwardly states, running a hand through his hair. "You should go."

"No, Harry, it's fi—"

"Please go! Just leave please." He snaps, making me flinch. He leaves the room without saying anything more and runs up the stairs. I hear a small crash, followed by a muffled groan. I shake my head and roll my eyes in aggravation. I'm getting tired of his him constantly overreacting. He leaves me in a small bubble of shock, shaken from his outburst.

I take a deep breath, grab my belongings, and trudge out the front door. I jump into the front seat of my car, mindlessly throwing my jacket and phone next to me in the passenger seat.

I sit still for a few seconds, collecting my scattered thoughts.

What happened? Did I just ruin my perfectly good friendship with Harry? Do I have feelings for him?

No. Of course not. I never thought of Harry as more than a friend, but what about him?

I let out another long breath, annoyed at myself for making Harry mad. But then again, it's not my fault. I wouldn't want to lead him on, this is the best for both of us.

I shake my head ridding of the thousands of thoughts drumming in my head. I turn on the car, shut off the radio, and make my way back home.

.

.

.

I wake up to the annoying sound of birds and bright beacons of sunlight shining through the glass windows, blinding me. The brightness causes me to squint and I shield my eyes by covering my face with my arm.

Grabbing my phone, I get up from the bed and walk down the stairs. Four messages from Carter.

Carter: Morning Trin!

Carter: Let's go to A&E's

Carter: GIRL WAKEUP! Before they sell out of those chocolate croissant things

Carter: I'm giving you ten minutes before I come over to drag you out of bed ;*

I quickly respond saying that yes I'm up, and I'll be there in a half hour. I throw my phone back on the bed, turning back around to change into my clothes.

.

.

.

"I don't know. I mean, does it really work? Everyone who gets a spray tan ends up looking like a burnt Cheeto."

"Very true." I laugh, taking a sip of my coffee.

Carter stuffs her mouth with another piece of her croissant in a highly unattractive way.

"So..." I begin. "How did your talk with Isaac go?"

She chokes on her food, looking down at her lap like a guilty kid. She clears her throat and purses her lips, making me anxious about her response.

"Um, well I think we are getting back together." She says quickly, obviously trying to avoid further questioning.

"What? That fast?"

"Yeah, but hear me out. We've been together for a year and 5 months, we aren't just going to throw away our relationship. I know, it's absolutely horrible that I hooked up with some random kid. But, in my defense we were broken up. And I know that's still not a decent thing to do but it was just a heat of the moment thing. He promised he will improve his attitude and he said sorry more times than I can count. And I also apologized many times and we forgave each other. Everything is fine now." She says, nonchalant and calm.

"Well that's good. I'm happy for you guys."

"He also promised he'll apologize to Harry."

"What? Really?" I ask, appalled.

"Yeah, I know, surprising right? But he promised so let's see how that goes."

"What is he going to apologize for?"

"Everything. All of his stupid, sly remarks, trying to get him in trouble, everything."

"Wow. I have to say I'm pretty impressed."

"Yeah, well you're welcome." She winks. "I asked him to."

"Thanks, Carter." I chuckle sarcastically. My laughter dies down as I think about Harry. I haven't heard from him yet. "Harry isn't talking to me." I say, nonchalantly.

"What? Why not?"

I wait a few moments in hesitation, knowing that Carter isn't too fond of him. I start fiddling with my straw, and tuck my hair behind my ear. "He kissed me." I say. "And I pushed him away. And then he snapped at me and told me to leave."

"Trin, I want you to be safe. I'm going to be brutally honest. Don't go for him. I understand how important your friendship is to Harry and to you. But, I just have a feeling a relationship would only cause more problems." She takes her eyes off of me and scans the restaurant. "Go for someone like... Him!" She points behind me.

I turn around looking for whoever she was pointing at. Familiar eyes lock with mine, and I immediately smile to myself.

"Grayson?" I say.

"Sunshine! Funny seeing you here." He smirks, walking towards our table.

I turn back around to Carter. "Carter, this is Grayson. Grayson, this is my friend Carter."

"Pleasure." He smiles, extending his hand for her to shake.

"You two know each other?" Carter looks completely confused.

"Yeah." I laugh. "I met him at a bar two weeks ago."

"Oh! How funny. Well, I'm going to go. My grandma is making me go shopping with her." She laughs. "See you later Trin!" She winks, blowing me a kiss.

"Bye!"

Grayson sits down in front of me, shooting me another one of his infamous smirks. "How have you been?"

"Pretty good. You?"

"Good! Really good, actually."

"Why so happy?" I ask, a huge smile plastered onto my face.

"One of my paintings got selected for an art show in New York City. It's a pretty big deal, so I'm excited."

"That's awesome! Wow, that's amazing. I draw, too."

"Really? Are you good?"

I shrug, "I guess so."

"Huh. I'd like to see." He grins. Reaching into his pocket, he pulls out his phone and hands it to me. "Put your number in. I'd like to see you more."