Breathin' (Jerrie)

Chapter 10 - Self-Medicate Pt I

TW// Drug abuse.

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Wor Mammy Debs: Congratulations petal! I've got Holiday streaming on the tele and me phone! I've pinched Mark's phone too and got it going on there! So proud of you darling Xxx

Dad🎵: You sound amazing as always princess! I'm a very proud father x

Jonnie: Well in mate. It's not even that shit.

Caitlin🤍: New summer hit?? I think so! xx Makes me wanna get on the Daiquiris! xx

Ellie Bellie ☀️: This calls for a celebration! I'll get some wine on my way home! xx

Sam Coxy: Well done on the single ladies! After all the hard work, you can finally put your hands up! Lol! Anyways, remember you've got interviews with Hits Radio, Capital and a few others today. I'll email you all the schedule. Keep it up!

Gorgy Huns

J'adore💜: wehayyy!!! cannit believe it man!😝

Jesminda🖤: Oh I know, I'm absolutely buzzing !😆

Leigh Leigh💚: I have a feeling that this era of Little Mix is gonna be something special! Xx

I let out a loud scream as my phone pings for what feels like the hundredth time in the last minute. I cover my ears, harshly gripping some of my hair in the process, just as Hatchi, Travis, Otis and Leo all start barking.

"Shut up!" I scream again, throwing my head face first onto my pillow.

I should feel happy right now. I should feel relieved, but instead I'm laying in the same spot of my bed that I've been in for the past 3 days, just shaking and crying over everything in my life. 'Holiday' has just been released after months of confusion and uncertainty, and I couldn't be more scared. I can't even explain why and that's what frustrates me. To make things worse, I've got a day full of interviews to promote the song and I don't know how I'm going to pull myself together. At least the girls will be on the call as well and I can rely on them if I get too uncomfortable.

Speaking of the girls, it's been a bit awkward between us and it's mainly my fault. That night at Jade's after the shoot, I ended up getting absolutely mortal, so much so that Jesy ended up having to hold my hair back as I violently vomited all over myself in the bath. The only good thing about that night is that they weren't able to bombard me with their worries due to my heavy intoxication. 

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I had my arms wrapped around Jade's neck as we danced together to Rihanna's 'Shut Up and Drive'. Actually I don't think you can call it dancing when I'm barely aware that I'm even standing up. It was more Jade swaying me about as I held on for dear life to keep myself upright.

I glanced over her shoulder seeing 3x Leigh and Jesy spinning around in circles together laughing. I shook my head knowing that can't be right, but it only made me more dizzy. I shut my eyes tightly and leaned my head forward to rest on Jade's shoulder to try and ground myself. It didn't do much though as my legs still felt very weak.

The song ended just as Jade stopped dancing, but my swaying did not. She herself was quite tipsy but managed to tighten her grip on my waist to keep me steady.