Evelyn

Chapter 17

The days that followed my appointment were a blur. I spent most of them sleeping and feeling sorry for myself. I needed to make a decision. Tell James and Frankie that I'm pregnant or go through the pregnancy alone and deal with it then.

I decided on the latter. Now that I know why I'm so tired all the time, I have prenatal vitamins that help boost my energy. So I did what I do best, I threw myself into my work. It was a nice distraction for a while. But I knew it wouldn't last.

---

Turning onto the street to my house I felt a sense of relief come upon me. It had been a long and stressful day at work and I was glad to be going home. I had it all planned out. Pjs, pizza and the notebook.

Then I noticed a car parked in my drive. Marks car. Shit! I couldn't let him see me. So I kept driving, parked around the corner and text Violet.

Hey, is Mark in our house?xx

She text back pretty much straight away.

I'm not sure? I'm in my moms right now..is everything ok xx

I'm not sure..is it?? I really don't want to see Mark but I can't really sit in my car forever either.

I'll be fine, probably my eyes playing tricks on me..need a snooze haha xx

You take it easy mama!! ;) Be home in an hour or so xx

I tucked my phone back into my purse and headed back to the house. I can do this, he won't know I'm pregnant. I just look like I've put on a few pounds. I threw the oversized cardigan, (that was sitting in my car for god knows how long), on me and wrapped it around my swollen torso.

With my chin up I walked up to the house. I half expected him to be hanging around here but he wasn't. Weird. Maybe he was just parking in our drive so he wouldn't have to pay to park his car in town.

I was in a world of my own when..

"EVELYN!!" He screamed and jumped out at me. I dropped to my knees with the fright and I wet myself.

I
Wet
My
Fucking
Self

Mustering all the strength I had, I pulled myself up and walloped him.

"What.the.fuck.is.wrong.with.you." Hitting him with my purse to punctuate every word. "What are you doing here? How did you get in??" I growled.

He chuckled at me, "spare key under the flower pot." He shrugged.

"Ok, that explains how you're here." I sighed. "Now explain why."

After what felt like an hour he finally spoke. Nervously he cleared his throat. "I know I don't have the right to ask for a favour right now. But--"

"Spit it out." I glared.

"I need your help...with Violet. She hasn't been returning my calls or texts."

"Do you blame her? She's really hurting right now and unless you're in the right headspace to be with her I don't think you should talk to her. She's very fragile, and you running away right now might push her over the edge."

"I've had a lot of time to think and sort through my own stuff--and um--I kinda..no! I'm in love with her and don't wanna waste any more time on what ifs."

I'm not sure if his it was his declaration of love or the raging hormones but I burst into tears. He rushed over to me and pulled me into his arms.

"What's wrong? I'm sorry, I shouldn't be loading this on you." He said as he rocked me back and forth and rubbed my back in comforting circles.

"No, I'm sorry. I'm a mess right now. I'm happy you talked to me but it isn't me you need to talk to about this." Pulling from his embrace. "She'll be home soon, I'll make myself scarce so you can sort this out."

He beamed back at me and I returned the smile though it didn't reach my eyes.

"Are you ok Evi?" Shoot. He knows me too well.

"I'm fine, just tired. I'll go take a shower and hit the hay. Give you time to sort everything out."

-------

I'm not sure when I fell asleep. Between the yelling and the laughing I zoned out. Next thing I knew it was morning.

You know that state you're in when you wake up? When you're still half asleep and oblivious to reality? Yeah, that sucks. It only makes the reality worse. Like a ice cold bucket of water thrown at your face, and it doesn't help that your two best friends are extremely happy.

I know it sounds selfish but I can't help it. A few months ago I had the perfect life, on paper.

House..check.
Gorgeous boyfriend..check.
Job..check.

Then it all went to shit. I had a routine going. Wake up, shower, work, dinner, sleep and repeat. I didn't even hang around long enough to have a conversation with my best friend. I just hid in my room.

But I couldn't hide forever.

I was laying on my bed scrolling through endless links on my facebook page when Violet barged into my room.

With her hands on her hips she basically screamed at me. "How long are you gonna keep this shit up?! You're ruining your life you know?" She huffed, "I barely see you anymore. We used to tell each other everything and now we're like strangers."

Letting a tear escape down her cheek, she angrily wiped it away. "This is not healthy and you need to man up!"

"What do you want from me?! What Violet? I don't have a manual on how to deal with this. I know I can't hide forever, I'm not stupid." I trailed off. Her words hit me hard. "I know what I have to do. But I'm scared." I sniffed.

The edge in Violets eyes softened dramatically. "I know you are, I'm sorry I was so harsh but I didn't know how else to get through to you. You're not alone."

We talked for the rest of the night, really talked. I forgot how much I missed it. She always knew what to say and had the best advice.

We came to the conclusion that I needed to sort out this dna test sooner rather than later, and I decided to start with Frankie.

I wasn't sure which outcome would be the best. The alcoholic ex boyfriend or the one night stand stranger.

--------------

Somehow I had convinced Frankie to meet me at the doctors office and give blood. I didn't tell him that it was for a dna test. I told him that I needed a blood transfusion and so far no one else was a match.

I know, I know. I'm an awful person and I should be ashamed of myself for not being honest. But I don't need the added stress of him knowing about my pregnancy, unless absolutely necessary.

So after giving blood I told him it would take a while for the results and I would contact him as soon as I knew.

The doctor told me that the test would take two days max and that he would phone me with the results the minute he received them.

I imagined both outcomes in my head.

One, Frankie was the father. He completely changes when our child is born and becomes very loving, affectionate and dotes on our baby. He gradually reverts to his ways and ends up cheating on me again and again. Leaving me to raise our child alone.

Two, James is the father. I always struggle with this outcome seeing as I don't really know him. However, I know that he will work a lot. His job is extremely demanding and time consuming, and what if he rejected us?

Each outcome led to the same thing. Single parent.

*******

Hey guys, sorry these last few chapters have been kind of depressing. Hang in there!

If you have any criticism, good or bad please comment and let me know.