Diving In

Tell Mama All About It/Mom

I scrambled for my clothing, looking under the bed for my underwear. What the hell had happened between Chan and I last night? I wondered. Chantel stirred in her sleep, the sheet clinging to her curvy silhouette. I got dressed quickly, found my keys and phone, and left. Literally running to my car. I sat trying to gather my thoughts.

Unlocking my phone, I saw a missed call from my mother, and a missed text from Josie. My eyes scanned the text from Josie and my heart fell. Fuck! No, no, no! I banged my head against the steering wheel. She wanted to make things official and here I was, thotting it up with Chantel! I needed to get my shit together, pronto. I re-dialed my mom before burning out of Chantel's complex. The line rang for a few until I heard her pick up. "Ma, I'm coming over." I sniffled "Nia, baby what's wrong?" She was always so worried about me. "I'll tell you everything when I get there, mom. Promise."

Shortly after I called my mother I found myself at her dinner table emotionally eating fresh baked apple pie. My mom was a short, shapely biracial woman with fair skin and hair that flowed down her back. I'd gotten her facial features, all except my almond shaped eyes, which came from my father. She finished tidying up the kitchen and joined me at the table. "So, you may as well spill it, honey." I looked into her eyes, my mom had the kindest eyes. I went on to tell her everything, literally.

She sat quietly for a few moments, weighing her words I suppose. "Nitalia, I think you've found a good woman in Josie. But baby, is what you're doing really worth the risk of losing her?" She held onto my hands across the table. "You know I'll never judge who you love, or how you choose to make ends meet, all I'm saying is you have some decisions to make. You hear?" I nodded my head yes. I definitely had to fix this.

After heading back to my house and showering, I mustered up the courage to call Josie. I paced the living room waiting for her to answer. "Hello?" She answered drowsily. Looking over at the clock I realized it was still fairly early. "Morning babe, I'm s-sorry I missed your text yesterday." I stammered over just that sentence, how was I supposed to tell her everything face to face? The line was quiet. "Nia? What time is it, where you been?" She sounded more awake now. I was sniffing again, fucking tears. "I need to see you, there are some things I have to tell you. Can I come over?" I was such a mess. "Yeah, yeah come right over. I'll be here." We hung up and I went to shower and dress, saying a silent prayer that she wouldn't leave my dumb ass once I confessed everything.