What Once I Was

Chapter 18

Sunlight struggled to break into the bedroom, leaving a dim illumination through the curtains. I wished, as I often did, that I'd purchased the sheer pastel yellow curtains I had fallen in love with rather than relenting to Robert. In my half dazed state, I called out for Robert to receive only the metal flapping of the letterbox as a response. With the house restored to its former glory and all items that I could think of accounted for, there was little for me to do but wait. I hoped he had listened to my many messages.

Shrugging on my dressing gown, the air unusually cold for that time of year, I made my way to the bathroom. The aroma wafting from my pits was sure to frighten anyone who dared approach me. I couldn't remember the last time I'd had a proper bath since Rover passed. Instead, I'd had rushed grandad washes as my family had always called them. I could hear my dad's booming voice as the water ran. Always wash your pits, bits and tits. I chuckled softly. Dad was always the crude one of the family, with a mouth that could make a sailor blush.

Bubbles overtook the bathtub, spilling onto the floor as I lowered a leg, gritting my teeth as the heat bit into my flesh. Robert had always hated sharing a bath with me. Bathing with the devil, he'd often complained as the steam fogged his glasses. Naomi and Rover had taken after him in that department, both preferring lukewarm baths at best.

My head had just rested against the cool bathtub when my mobile vibrated on the toilet lid, falling to the floor before I could scramble to get it. Robert's name shone at me in bold letters. Wiping my hands on the towel hanging within arm's reach, I rushed to answer.

"Thank God! Robert, someone broke in last night. The house was a mess! I don't think they took anything but-"

"I want a divorce."

His voice, calm and collected, ripped through me. Tumbling out the bath, I let out a nervous laugh. He was joking. Right? Pulling a towel about me, still unwashed but no longer caring, I struggled to find the words to string together to create an appropriate response.

"I'm sorry. Say that again. It sounded like you were asking for a divorce."

My heart pounded against my rib cage, threatening to escape, to run away with a little stick and handkerchief hanging over its shoulder.

"That's because I did. I can't deal with your lies anymore. I know everything."

I sunk to my knees, back hitting the toilet, knocking the wind out of me. This couldn't be happening.

"You're talking crazy Robert. We don't need a divorce. We can fix whatever's wrong!" I begged, visions of life alone playing on a loop.

"Can you give me back the years of my life without our other daughter?"

My breath caught. He knew. The realisation that it could have been no one other than Twin B who phoned the other day hit like a train.

"That's what I thought. Save it, I don't need to hear another word from you. Anything you want to say, you can say to my lawyer. I'm done."

The phone clicked in my ear. That bitch! She couldn't have just left us alone. I hated her. Only a succubus would enter a marriage with the intention of tearing it apart. She was no daughter of mine. She was nothing. I wanted nothing more than for her to join Naomi. It was no less than she deserved.

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"Do you not think that the only reason your marriage failed was because you couldn't be honest with your husband? That the poor girl had nothing to do with it. You caused all of this and made everyone who came close to you a victim. Why blame someone innocent for your wrong doings?" Ben looks at me, venom in his eyes.