🄿🄻🄴🄰🅂🄴, 🅂🅃🄰🅈 | OsaSuna Angst

50

AKAASHI'S POV

I need to escape... call Osamu... tell him all of Rintarō's plan... even if I can't stop the wedding, at the very least Samu would know the truth.

If Samu would know the truth, will it change everything? I mean... he never stops loving Rin... Does that mean Osamu and I can't really be together? Will Samu stop the wedding? Will he go to Hyogo just to see the love of his life?

All I wanted to do now is the right thing.... even if it means it'll hurt me....

everything for one person I love the most.

Osamu.

But somehow... I felt doubtful about my own feelings....

Wouldn't it benefit me more if I just let Rin marry Konami Bokuto and I'll get more chance with Samu?

But... Thinking like this, makes me wonder if I'm being selfish....

I'm baffling... I'm uncertain..

I mean... What am I even doing here? I shouldn't be here on the first place... If I only stayed back in Tokyo, try to talk to Samu, I could have...

No...

Nothing... Nothing would make Samu fall for me...

I had my chance....

I still couldn't have him for myself.... because his heart... belongs to someone else's.... not me....

All I wanted is make things right... I want Rin to... I want him to be happy.... because he is my best friend... I want the best for him.... but I know I couldn't change him back to the way he was before....

Everything changed.

What do I even want?

I could have Samu for myself, but that would break Rin's already broken heart. Rintarō isn't supposed to be suffering like this, if only his older twin brother didn't die few years back... He wouldn't be forced into this arranged marriage. It would have been the eldest son to be the heir for his family, the sacrifice. It should had been Rinmarō....

Is this the same reason why you committed suicide Marō? The burden of the entire family? I asked myself as I leaned here in the headboard of the bed staring at the darkness of the room

I wonder how Rintarō is managing himself? I want him back... my old best friend... I want him to live a peaceful life..

If his family won't let him achieve this, it's my job to do it....

"He needs me!" I told myself louder than I intended to, startling Bo who is silently sleeping in my lap facing my tummy.

There is no particular reason for this... He just insisted and I.... couldn't resist it... He's older but acts like a 6-year old kid.

I stared at his starry bright eyes as he rubbed them. Those are beautiful orbs of gold.

Beautiful orbs of gold.... Damn.. I have been staring at him.

"What's... that... princess?" he asked leaning forward and kissing my lips.

Shocked, I scoot away from him making his head fell into the bed

He is so bold when it comes to this things.

"What's wrong with...you?!?" I asked loudly

He stretched his arms and yawned. He reached for the pillow and settled his head on it staring at nothing on the ceiling.

"Nothing, princess... I just.. wanted to .. greet you... that's it..." he replied afterwards as he stared at me with a smile.

I sighed.

He slowly sat on the bed indian sit, sighed, stood, and head to the couch without saying anything, to continue his sleep again...

I flung my head down...

It's the middle of the night anyway... I looked at the alarm clock beside the table and realize that it's almost dawn....

Today is Rintarō's wedding....

My sweat started to build up as panic grew in my chest... I need to escape... and help Rin escape this stupid burden his family is putting on him..

I need to escape, but how?!

My eyes drifted to Bo who is just standing in the middle of the room.

"I know, what you're thinking, Keiji.... You're planning to escape, aren't you?" he said, his back facing me.

I didn't respond... I don't need to answer him... I don't want him to be involved....

"Use me." He said now turning to face me.
"Use me whatever purposes it may be..."

"What do you-"

"I'll be your shield, your protector.. Tell me, Keiji... What do you need me for? I'll do everything, just love me back-"

"Don't be stupid! Why are you like this?! You're being foolish!!!! I'm not gonna love you back! I'm not..." I stopped realizing the tears escaping his eyes.

He stares at me with his eyes glistening into the moonlight.

"You.. don't.. have to.. love me back then if you couldn't... Just let me.. love..you.." he continued with some sniff walking towards the bed

I almost stopped breathing.

"Why... Why are you like this? Don't... let your feelings get the best of you!" I yelled making him flung his head down.

"I... I want... I want to..."

I waited for his answer until he broke down, and fell into the floor.

"I want..to... I want to be loved.... be accepted... for who I am... be part of a family... I want to be... happy... I want.. someone... who... can love me for who I am... I want nothing... but to be special and be valued... I want to be useful... I want to...-"

I just find myself kneeling in front of him, tears in my eyes, and hug him tightly.

I know what he feels... I know it...

"You're not an object to be used, Bo... You're someone special... There are people.. out there who love and value you.. You aren't alone...." I whispered into his ear calming him down

He stared at me.... His eyes are full of tears and questions...

"What... What about you, Keiji?" he asked sniffing

"I... We just met... but I know you're special, a good person. We... we can't be lovers right now..."

He tensed up again and looked away from me...

"But... we could start by being friends..." I continued as we break the embrace, and he lifted his face brighter than his dejected expression earlier.

Being this close to him, eyes staring at each other makes my heart skip a beat....

"R..Really!?" he stuttered

We both sat on the floor facing each other.
"Yes... But now... We need to escape from this place... Take Rin with us and-"

"Take him?!? Why?" he questioned wiping his tears away.

"I'll explain later... Let's think of something first so we could escape."