My last love

Sweet home

When I got home I thought twice whether I should go in or not. I ended up choosing the former so I went in, took off my shoes and jacket and went upstairs to my room to do my homework.

After I finished my homework and hang up a little bit on my phone I saw that it was 16:30. 'Time for lunch' I thought.  I went downstairs to the kitchen where my mother was already sitting. "Hey mom how are you?" I asked she didn't answer me as usual. I told her about my day and ate my food.

I know you will ask why I'm talking with her when she doesn't talks with me. But actually I always said that it was my fault that my mother was in a 'coma' so I do anything I can to make her smile or talk. I hope that our new life will change her too. I mean maybe she will be more talkative. But I don't know what to do more than talking with her.

After I ate my food I wash the dishes. When I finished 'finally!' I thought and wanted to go up in my room. But then I heard the door opening.

It is him! What should I do? Just go upstairs in my room? but what if he comes in? Should I stay here like this and wait what he is going to do? No no no. You have to go upstairs and then you can lock your door and nothing would happen.

So I ran upstairs but when I was so short  to go in my room someone pulled me back. "No don't do it. Please!" I cried. But the person just pushed me on the floor and begin to shout at me. "What do you think that I will do nothing, that I will just let you go if you beg for it. No. You did a mistake and so you need to become your punishment." He yelled at me.

He begin to hit me everywhere so my body was shaking like crazy and my face was full of tears. When he thought that it was enough for my 'punishment' I got up and went in my room I closed the door and locked it up.

I went into my bathroom and searched this silver little thing which will make all my pain go away. As I found it I sat down on the floor and started scratching my arms. I saw the blood coming out from my scars and drip on the floor. It hypnotised me and I begin to laugh with tears in my eyes.

Why it had to be me? Why do I have to struggle because of that accident? Why do I have to be hated by everyone? Why...? Those questions went through my head.

I stand up and washed my arms after that I bandaged my arms and got out from the bathroom. I just wanted to go to bed now so I brush my teeth and wore my pyjamas and went into my bed.

I couldn't sleep for a long time thinking about what happened again. I just hope that tomorrow would be better than today.