My last love

Confusion

Jm pov:

After my friends were gone I just lay there looking at the ceiling. What am I supposed to do? He will probably be my enemy from today on! Aish I don't want to.

"Okay, come on let's go now. We have to talk about what happened." I heard Jins voice. "Ehm can you help me to stand up first?" Hobi already was on his way to me and helped me to stand up. "Thanks" I said.

~~
"Now tell us what happened!" Reiterated Jin after we were at his house. "So I just wanted to talk with him but he told me again that I should know my place and I couldn't hold my mouth. Aish. I hate it! Why can't I just shut up?" "Don't be mad Jimin. It's not your fault!" Hoseok tried to make sure that I didn't have self-doubt.

Of course my friends know about my past and about what happens at home. And they know too that I had self-doubt back then too and it didn't really end well.

𝐹𝑙𝑎𝑠ℎ𝑏𝑎𝑐𝑘

𝐼𝑡 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑎 𝑑𝑎𝑦 𝑎𝑓𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑠𝑐ℎ𝑜𝑜𝑙． 𝐴𝑛𝑑 𝑎𝑔𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑚𝑦 𝑝𝑎𝑟𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑠 ℎ𝑖𝑡 𝑚𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑏𝑢𝑙𝑙𝑖𝑒𝑑 𝑎𝑡 𝑠𝑐ℎ𝑜𝑜𝑙． 𝐼 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑𝑛'𝑡 ℎ𝑜𝑙𝑑 𝑖𝑡 𝑎𝑛𝑦𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑒！
"𝑊ℎ𝑦 𝑚𝑒？𝑊ℎ𝑦 𝑐𝑎𝑛'𝑡 𝐼 𝑗𝑢𝑠𝑡 𝑑𝑖𝑒？" 𝐼 𝑎𝑠𝑘𝑒𝑑 𝑚𝑦𝑠𝑒𝑙𝑓．

𝐼 𝑡𝑜𝑜𝑘 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑠ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑝 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝐼 𝑢𝑠𝑒𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑙𝑎𝑠𝑡 𝑑𝑎𝑦𝑠 𝑎 𝑙𝑜𝑡 𝑎𝑔𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑏𝑒𝑔𝑖𝑛 𝑡𝑜 𝑑𝑟𝑎𝑤 𝑚𝑦 𝑏𝑜𝑑𝑦 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑠𝑐𝑎𝑟𝑠． 𝐼 𝑑𝑖𝑑𝑛'𝑡 𝑙𝑜𝑜𝑘 𝑎𝑡 𝑖𝑡 ℎ𝑜𝑤 𝑚𝑢𝑐ℎ 𝑠𝑐𝑎𝑟𝑠 𝐼 ℎ𝑎𝑑 𝑎𝑡 𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑡 𝐼 𝑑𝑖𝑑𝑛'𝑡 𝑓𝑒𝑒𝑙 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑝𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑎𝑛𝑦𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑒．𝐴𝑓𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑤ℎ𝑖𝑙𝑒 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑠𝑤𝑜𝑙𝑙𝑒𝑛 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑑𝑖𝑧𝑧𝑦．

𝑇ℎ𝑒 𝑛𝑒𝑥𝑡 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒 𝐼 𝑤𝑜𝑘𝑒 𝑢𝑝 𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑖𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒 ℎ𝑜𝑠𝑝𝑖𝑡𝑎𝑙 𝑛𝑒𝑥𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑒 𝑚𝑦 𝑏𝑒𝑠𝑡 𝑓𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑑𝑠． "𝐽𝑖𝑚𝑖𝑛 𝑤ℎ𝑎𝑡 ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑒𝑛𝑒𝑑？" 𝐻𝑜𝑏i 𝑎𝑠𝑘𝑒𝑑． 𝐴𝑛𝑑 𝐼 𝑒𝑥𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑖𝑛𝑒𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑚 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔．

𝐹𝑙𝑎𝑠ℎ𝑏𝑎𝑐𝑘 𝑒𝑛𝑑

That was how they knew about everything what happened. "Jimin we want you to be happy!" "I know, but what can I do? Back then I shut my mouth and they bullied me and now I talk and he bullies me again. I just want to be happy too! Maybe being happy isn't something I should feel?!" "No don't think like that!" Our hope said. "I'm sure we can do something against it!" "And what? Do you want to bully him back or what?" "No but maybe we can find another way!" Hoseok said with frustration in his voice. "Let's think about it for now and later we can talk about it again. If anyone has a good idea just tell us." Jin suggest. "Okay, let's do it like that."

I went home and went upstairs the quietest I could. When I was in my room I went straight to bed. I just wanted to rest now.

What should I do? Is he going to do it for a long time? Why does every time an attractive ehm I mean a boy who looks a little handsome be unreachable for me. Okay what the fuck! Why am I thinking something like this?! Forget it, forget it, forget it!

I couldn't sleep all night thinking about what will happen next. I also thought about what we can do and I had an idea but I don't know if it's really a good one. I will talk about it with the boys in the cafe after school.