With Shaking Hands

It starts with a gaze

It started with a gaze. I had seen you so many times beforehand, I had been so long in the fog of my own mind I seen you, but I didn't notice you. You stayed in the background, so much like myself you tried to disappear into your surroundings. It wasn't until our eyes met that my eyes opened for the first time in what felt like a lifetime. I had seen you so many times, but for the first time I noticed you. We stood across from each other neither of us breaking the gaze, as my heart started to race I felt a smile break out across my face. A spark was lit inside my chest. For the rest of the night we stood side by side talking about everything you could possibly think of. I hadn't talked to anyone like that, the instant connection. I was so drawn to you. I went home that night and all I could think about what how the sound of your voice was the most comforting thing I've ever heard. How your arm brushing against mine felt like shocks of electricity. The way the fluorescent lights brought out the green in your hazel eyes. Your mannerisms and the way your curls bounced when you walked. I asked a friend for your information so I could thank you for helping me at work that night. I woke up to a good morning message every morning at 5:30am for weeks. Days on end we talked from the moment we woke up until the moment we fell asleep to continue into the next day without pause. I wanted to know everything about you. We had so much in common, like carbon copies. Sometimes it was scary how alike we were because I knew the internal battles I faced everyday and I only worried that you faced them too. The ways we grew up, were we were born, everything was so similar. Even our birthdays. We spent so many nights sitting on that bench with the snow falling down onto our already cold red cheeks. It started with a gaze, and ended without a gaze, without a word, without a reason.