Chapter 25

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          I thought back to a time in childhood when I was still hopeful to keep friends and I had been hanging around this girl for some time

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          I thought back to a time in childhood when I was still hopeful to keep friends and I had been hanging around this girl for some time. I loved going to her house because she had a lot of food there and snacks I could never dream of finding where I lived. I don't know how her mom found out about my mom but I do remember the day that woman told me I wasn't allowed to come over anymore. 

Whatever she said to her daughter had convinced her to ignore me at school. I remember them turning their noses up at me and I was so sad that I had lost my only friend. I had lost friends before when I mentioned innocently about the fact that I was chained sometimes. I was called weird and they stopped talking to me. So I learned not to talk about my home life at all and still somehow I lost my friend.

 That little girl and her family were church going people and I look back now at how ironic it is that they had no gracious heart at all. They praise the Lord and pretend to be generous and kind people but they aren't. They turn their noses up at the slightest inconvenience.

A dirty little girl with a drug addict mother, how awful, they must've cringed at me.

        Religion is a load of crap now that I really think of it. But the Moon Goddess felt more along the lines of mythology, then again, Werewolves were myths but they're very much real...so. She has to be real because they say that's where the Mate bond stems from. Is that true or is that just a belief like any other religion would be? If she is real then can she hear me? I remember I once mentioned to Mel that I wished she did the Mate things for humans because I found it to be lovely and she told me maybe I just didn't know what the Moon Goddess does for humans. 

Did she have a hand in the human world? If I was meant to be a mate then wouldn't I actually be under her guidance because that would mean she made Devran and I for each other. So, she would hear me. I would be relevant to her. I remember when I had nothing to offer her at the altar of the Alpha changing ceremony. I made her a silly flower ring but it was all I had and I wanted to pay my respects. 

Maybe I should have given her the moonstone necklace Diego had given me. But giving a gift away that someone else gave you sounded less like an offering and more like being ungrateful. Was she looking down on us that night?

        I looked up at the sky and tipped my head in thought. "Are you real?" I asked aloud. No response. I laughed at myself. I shut my eyes again and tried to meditate. If the Moon Goddess was real what would I want her to look like? I bet she'd have long beautiful waves of hair as dark as a night sky. She'd glow beautiful like the moon does. Her eyes would be brighter than stars. Blue maybe, like a day sky. She'd be in a Goddess gown like I picture the old Greek Goddess looked like in their olympian gowns flowing in beautiful fabrics. 

The moon controls our tides. With a whisper she can shift the waves to crash to shore. She would probably be barefoot. Of nature and grace. I pictured such a beautiful woman because I was bored and decided to make her like a character in my mind. Maybe then, if I put a face on her, I could get her to talk to me. Am I like a child waiting for Santa Claus out here?

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