Chapter 45

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         When I called Devran out for sneaking out on me this morning after having shared one of my first sexual experiences with someone, waiting to hear his explanation felt like slow torture

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         When I called Devran out for sneaking out on me this morning after having shared one of my first sexual experiences with someone, waiting to hear his explanation felt like slow torture. He had only paused to study my demeanor for probably a few seconds but it felt so much longer. I was vulnerable and feeling exposed. "I only left because I thought it best to avoid Melanie and Nealin in the morning. You had been flustered enough to get caught by your friend. And besides, I had work to do" he turned away from me on the last part. 

"Work? Hm." It felt like a poor excuse. Maybe he was embarrassed to get caught too. Maybe he didn't want anyone to know that he hooked up with someone like me. It wouldn't surprise me. "Don't overthink it, Mira. I see your eyes drifting to some distant place in your head" he called me out. My eyes snapped back into focus and I turned away from his desk to face the door. I just wanted to leave now.

 Instead, I heard the wheels of his desk chair roll back and he took the few steps around the desk to stand directly behind me. When his warm hands were placed on my arms I didn't mean to lean into his touch but I did.

     "I wasn't being a dick, alright? Last night was a good time" he tried assuring me. "You make it sound cheap," I admitted. Maybe I was being dramatic because I was feeling embarrassed and overwhelmed with my first time doing...that. "How?" He scoffed. "It felt like a one night stand that you sneak away from come morning." I still hadn't turned around so he was standing behind me with his hands on my arms as we both faced the closed door. "Oh come on" he sucked his teeth. 

"You're calling it a one night stand, so does that mean you want it to happen again?" Now he spun me around. My hand went to his chest to steady myself when I was turned that quickly and it made the small gap between us more obvious.

      We both looked between it before our eyes caught again. "I-I didn't mean it like that" I tried to back track from my original point. "What then?" He asked me, but his voice wasn't rude. "Nothing, never mind" I huffed. My hands felt shaky because my heart rate had spiked too quickly and I was stupidly nervous to be this close and thinking the things I was thinking about. What he did to me last night, the way he made me feel, it was an addictive feeling and I shamelessly wanted more of it. 

"Why are you flustered? Say what you wanted to say" he challenged me. I shut my eyes and shook my head. His hold on me tightened which forced my attention again. "Nothing, I'm confused."

His brows furrowed and his eyes examined me from head to toe. His hands released me but only to cup my chin and force me to look at him. "Confused about what?" I was done with this line of questioning and as I removed my chin from his hold I took a step back so I could turn without bumping body's with him, but he is quick and caught on to what I was doing. He didn't let me step away.

          The air shifted between us when he closed the gap and dipped his head lower so he could whisper beside my ear to keep from supernatural hearing. "Your pulse has quickened, your breathing changed. Are you thinking about last night? Is that what's confusing you?" Devran's tone turned gruff and seductive. "N-no" I lied. His hand brushed down my neck and caressed my side. What is this thick tension in the air? It was making me hazy and my inside pooled the way they had last night only he was barely touching me. 

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