Peace - jaylor story (peace book 1)

im fine

-taylors pov-

I'm standing in front of the mirror in our LA home ready to put on my dress for the golden globes. This will be the first-time joe and I sit together at an event where we know there will be cameras on us. Sure we have been at events at the same time, mostly afterparties, but this is the first time we will sit together during the main event. 

Its nerve-wracking and exiting at the same time. Over the last several years I've grown to hate events like these because I don't like putting on an act where I'm petrified to make a single mistake. Years ago, back in fall 2016, my life changed for the better and I enjoy a quiet life where I don't put on an expensive dress and go to parties all the time. Now I enjoy quiet nights in with joe, family or my close friends. Going with joe will probably make it more exciting because I feel so comfortable around him. It's like every time I preform, I get so much calmer if I know he is in the audience.

The bad thing though is that I'm absolutely exhausted these days. I feel slightly sick and just not like myself. But it's probably just nerves. I haven't been telling joe or anyone about how I'm doing because I don't want to bother people with something that's basically nothing. The world has so many problems now with the virus that's in China that my silly little lack of energy isn't an issue I want to even bring up.

I slip into my dress which has a tight bust and a big skirt. There is a cutout on my stomach right over where the skirt starts and it's a beautiful combination of green and golden yellow. Taking deep breaths, I remind myself its only for a couple of hours and then we will go to the afterparty and have fun without all the cameras.

Tree and joe's publicist rue gives us the rundown of the evening in the car on the way to the event. This I'm used to; I've gotten this rundown so many times over the years that its second nature at this point. I really don't need to even hear it, but I get that they're only doing their job. I really love tree; she has been with me since right before the first single off 1989 was released. She has always had my back and helped me through any scandal that I have had to face.

I can sense joe is nervous, so I lay a hand on his thigh and squeeze it lightly and he lay his hand on top of mine and intertwine our fingers. He isn't used to events like these even though he has been going to them since his first movie in 2016. By now he is used to it, but I know he isn't comfortable in settings like these. Even though he is an actor he has never been interested in the celebrity side of this job, he just wants to practice his art and leave it as that.

His way of thinking has rubbed off on me from the beginning, now I value the same things. That's probably why we have chosen to live in Nashville for the most part because there we get to be left alone by the public. There aren't any paparazzi there, so we don't really need to worry about them following us. And the people there know me and have always respected me enough to give me room to breathe which I really appreciate. We also live there to be close to my mom since she is still sick and in a relapse from her cancer. If anything happen I want to be close to her to help.

We part ways after we exit the car to go on the red carpet. It wasn't a hard decision to decide we would do that separately. Our relationship really isn't one that we want to have in the public too much, so we decided the meet up inside. It's also easier because joe is doing interviews but I'm skipping over that part. As my career has grown i dont do many interviews anymore. At the level I am at you get to make those kinds of choices that you can't do early on. At this point I really don't need the exposure interviews get you, so I save myself from some anxiety when I just jump over it.

"Taylor over here!"

"Taylor look to your left!"

"Taylor look to your right!!"