Before You Say I Do

Chapter One

I wish I could say that I chased after him, that I ran to the airport and got a plane ticket and begged him not to leave years ago. I wish I could say that he stayed and we got married and bought a house and lived like the happy family we were meant to be. But does that sound like something I would do? Does that sound like my life? No, not even close.

Dakota and Finn were the ones who chased after him. They were the ones that came back emptied handed and they were the ones that cried on their wedding night.

Katelyn called her parents, trying to convince them to force Adam to turn around, though they wouldn’t listen to a word she said. Basically calling her a young fool over the phone.

Doria was the one that allowed me to spend the night at the bakery. Letting all my anger and sadness out through making cakes and pastries. She was the only one who understood how much baking relaxed me.

Now though, as I stand in the same spot I did years ago, the small action of baking isn’t helping anything. The tears quickly fall down my face, one after another and the anger fumes through me like a steam engine.

I was mad, angry, pissed off, depressed, sad, and for some god damn reason I was happy. Which only made me angrier.

Why should I be happy? He’s marrying the girl who called me white trash for heavens sake! And I’m happy for him!?

No wonder kids hated me. I get it now. I get how it’s so annoying to be so nice and forgiving. But that’s not stopping me from feeling happy.

I finally give up and put the batter I was making in the fridge away. I packed up and left the bakery at about eight which was much later than I usually got home.

Jon was still there, taking care of Katie like I should have been. When I walked through the door he was in the bathroom, helping her brush her teeth. He really was great with her, and equally nice to me. But there wasn’t that spark, that magnetic pull that I had with Adam.

Katie looks up and notices me, “mom!” she yells, her mouth full of toothpaste. Jon and I laugh and she spits it out, wiping her mouth clean before running up and jumping into my arms. “where have you been?” she loved acting like she was in charge of the house, always wanting to know where I was or where I was going.

“I had to do some things around the bakery. Sorry it took so long.” I said the last part more to Jon than I did to Katie, but it was meant for both. I set Katie down, “now go off to bed sweetie, it’s already passed your bedtime.

“will you come read a story to me?”

“of course, let me just talk to Jon for a moment and then I’ll be up.” She nods and runs into her room.

Jon comes up and wraps his arms around my waist, kissing me gently. I return the kiss, but like I said earlier, felt nothing. He pulls back and looks into my eyes, “you’ve been crying.” He states. “everything alright?”

I nod, “yeah, it’s fine.”

“Julie you seemed good when I dropped you off. What happened?”

I pull out of his arms and step back, “I’ll tell you tomorrow…maybe. I need to work some things out first.”

“okay. You need me to stay?” I knew this was more of him wanting to stay than actually caring if I needed him to stay.

I shake my head no, “I need to be alone tonight. I promise I’ll call you tomorrow though.”

He nods and kisses my forehead before opening the front door. “goodnight Julie.” He says.

I half-heartedly smile, “goodnight.”

After Jon left I made my way up and read Katie a story. She was already sleepy so it didn’t take long for her to fall asleep.

I made my way back down and curled up on the sofa. It was about nine now and I felt the need to call somebody. The only two people that would be there for me in times like these.

I dial their phone number and Dakota answers on the first ring. “Jules!” she screams over the phone.

Before I could reply the waterworks started, I was bawling my eyes out and couldn’t help it. “I need you guys.” I whisper into the phone.

I heard her cover the speaker part with her hand but her voice still echoed through it, “Finn! Start the car!” she yells. “we’ll be there in a minute.” Not needing nor wanting to say anything else I just hang up the phone and wait for my two best friends to show up on my doorstep.