Saving Me

Don't be so Hard on Yourself

Matt's POV:

"You have lost your damn mind Ebony if you think I'm letting this child out of my sight." I said when the doctor when to take the little girl from my arms. "I found her, and she is scared. I am the person that she first saw that made her feel safe."

"Matt, you know I have to check her out. And to do that properly, you must place her on the bed." Said Ebony. "Please, make my life easier and cooperate with me."

"Fine, but I'm not leaving her side. So don't even think of telling me that I have to leave this room." I said as I lowered the child to the bed. "And if you make her cry, it's to be on like Donkey Kong."

"Wouldn't think of it." Ebony said as she rolled her eyes, knowing that my threat was just an idle one as she began checking over the child. "You know, the lord about had his hand on this little angel and her mama. I heard that area had slammed pretty hard."

"It did. When I left, these two were the only survivors we found." I said. "It looks like a damn war zone over there Eb."

"I heard. Sheriff Vann was in here a little bit ago. Said that he wouldn't be scared to say that it was an F5 that went thought that part of Jackson." She said, tickling the baby's belly as she examined her. "He said that Seaboard and Pendleton were a mess too."

"I haven't heard about those towns. Just know what I saw in Jackson." I said with a sigh. "And he's right. It looks just like Joplin did." At my words, Ebony whipped her head in my direction. She knew that I never talked about that day.

"That bad?" she said, her voice cracking. Ebony knew what I lost that day since she had also lost a sister and a niece that day as well.

"Yeah. Maybe even a little worse given the size of the towns my comparison." I said. Needing to touch the child that I'd saved, I walked over to the edge of the bed and placed my finger in the child's hand. Almost immediately she gripped it tight and smiled up at me, sending a pang of sorrow though me. What I wouldn't give to see a smile like that from my own daughter.

But my thoughts were soon interrupted by the sound of a woman screaming from down the hall. I could hear her screaming, wanting to know where her baby is. Without even thinking about it, I lifted the child from the bed and began walking towards the trauma bay that the commotion was coming from. As I slid the door open, I saw the woman that had been found holding the baby sitting up in the bed, fighting with the nursing staff to get free. As if sensing that her child was near, the woman stopped fighting and looked me dead in the eye. The relief that washed over her was so strong that she collapsed onto the bed, no more fight left in her.

Walking further into the room, I made my way over to the bed. When I reached the side, I smiled down at the woman. "I'm guessing you must be this little angel's mama."

"Is-Is she o-okay?" asked the woman, tears streaming down her cheeks. "Please tell me that my baby is okay."

"She's fit as a fiddle." I said proudly. "Or at least as far as we know." Moving slowly so as not to jostle the child or scare the woman, I lowered the little angel into the woman's arms and watched as he snuggled her to her chest, holding her much like she had been when we found the two of them. Seeing her with the child, watching as tears streamed down her face because of the joy she was feeling upon knowing that she had protected her child had my own tears rolling down my face unchecked.

But they really started to fall when I watched the woman place a kiss on the child's head and whisper that she was so afraid she had lost the best thing she had ever done in life. Her words made me think of my own loss and how I would argue until I was blue in the face that the best thing I had ever done was married Cassie and shared my DNA with a child that she and I had created. Suddenly, the room felt too small, too loud, and just too much. I needed to get out.