Disclaimer
None of the photos are mine
CTTO
Also credits to:
Jordan Mcewen
Summer Mckeen
*****
His finger is gently tracing my spine like he's giving me time to think for an explanation while he slide it on my skin up and down.
The unusual silence continue to keep my mouth shut because I know if I were to answer it wrong, I'll probably regret it and should have shut my mouth in the first place. I just didnt expect he will try to ask about it when we are this quiet and relaxed. He did put it in this timing where there is nothing to get distract from. The silence is getting longer and longer and the time I am spending with this silent treatment makes his arms tightened around me.
" River "
He softly speak behind my ear then presses his lips on it. Still not giving me time to think. I thought that when he finally notices it I might somehow prepare anything. But I'm blank. And nervous too.
" are you okay with this River ? This feeling you are taking for granted. You feel it too right ? Dont think it was strange. This warmth and comfort. The familiarity with each other. Stop confusing yourself. It was always been like this. "
He was right about all of it. The first time I saw him does not have the most impact. That night when we sat to look at the stars. The first time he held me, it all starts to mess my mind. Why do I fell in love too easy ? I have never known attraction, affection and romance before. But he simply arrives in front of me. Like he was here to remind me of what it used to be.
I took it for granted. I set this feeling aside and deemed unneccesarry. All because I thought he was a stranger I just met and fell in love with.
But something keeps resurfacing. The obvious reason I shouldnt turn my back on this matter is giving me guilt. I dont hold any truth about me. Nor do I have any means of knowing it. And if I were to tell him everything, I can just point Delver to do it.
But I want to know his side. What he has to tell for himself. I agree with all my heart, this familiarity with each other is questionable.
Thinking about this helped me decide what to do. I looked back at him. He do recognized everything on me.
" what do you see in them ? Who am I before you met me ? "
He put both his hands on my cheeks and stared deep into my eyes.
" I see the meaning of life. You saved me from despair. Since that day, I think you were that angel that reached my hand. "
" I was thinking what pushes me to make the trade. I thought I was just curious. I was wrong. It was to see you. This body is fading. Dont be bothered by these changes. It has to happen. You'll remember the most important thing. And that is my love. I love you Jared. With whoever I am before, today and forever. "
" No. What ? What are you talking about ? Not agai- "
" and what about you ? Why did you believe you love me for real ? "
He was about to retort but I have to hear it first. He has his own lies as well. I was wondering if he will change his mind and tell something to me.
" I love you and its the realest thing I know. "
And here I thought I would hear something interesting. Of course he'll say that. Just like how I told him about my feelings too. This is becoming edgy at some point. Stares too deep and both of us cant keep our hands on each other. I'm afraid we might got into it again.
