First Touch || Shinichiro Sano

Chapter 15

The next morning you woke up to your alarm clock, feeling more tired than ever. After the first time you were with Shinichiro, you were surprised how fast you fell asleep, and how good you slept through the night thanks to the uhm, activites you did, which drained all of your energy.

But last night, after you got home, it didn't help that he tired you out, because of the last words he said to you.

You're different than the others.

What did he mean by that?

You were thinking about it for hours, and still couldn't figure it out. And it didn't help that your crush on him was starting to turn more serious. You noticed that you couldn't keep him out of your head for more than a few minutes, and while he always greeted you with open arms, the day of your departure was getting closer, and you couldn't help but wonder how things will be after you leave.

Is he gonna be in touch with you? Or maybe now, that he gave you what you asked him to, he's gonna let you go? After all, you only asked him to take your virginity.

But it's another story that after that night he invited you back in his bed again, saying he couldn't get you out of his head either.

Or maybe it was just the fresh feeling of excitement and pridefulness you ignited in him what made him come back to you. That a young woman like you wanted an older man like him to be her first.

Maybe he is just playing nice until you leave, feeling responsible for your first experience to be good.

You wished you could be hopeful, you wanted to think that he was starting to feel the same things as you, but you also weren't naive.

He had a life before you came home and he will have a life after you leave. He was also older than you and he surely wanted to do completely different things than you.

You were fresh out of college and sure, you didn't have a job yet, but after you find one, you want to discover the world, you want to go to different countries, you want to explore yourself so you find out what you wanted to really do, not just job-wise, but figure out what you wanted from life itself.

While Shinichiro was far more experienced. You remebered while you were in high school and he used to come over for dinner, he talked about all the countries he visited, all the things he learned about different cultures... The joy and freedom in his eyes while he talked about his adventures were captivating and you wanted to experience the same.

But maybe now he saw everything, maybe after all the travelling, he wanted to settle down.

He used to have a lot of girlfriends, and you were sure he dated someone in every country he visited, but maybe he wanted to finally lean back and find someone who has been through the same as him. To be with someone who can share their own experiences, and together they can create more memories...

You haven't noticed but you were staring at the ceiling for about half an hour thinking about that, so you quickly rubbed your eyes and got up from the bed to get dressed, and help your mom with the grocery shopping.

•••

You haven't seen Shinichiro the whole day, and you both were excited and afraid of dinner time.

Maybe it would be better to end things here, he showed you how you should let other guys treat you before, during and after sex. You were not afraid now to tell someone to stop if you don't feel like going further, because they should respect your choice, and stop immediately without getting their ego hurt.

You were not afraid to go further either than light making out, and now you were more confident about what you wanted from a man.

It would be better to end things here, before you fall for him more, because let's be honest...

He was amazing.

And the further you drag it, the harder it will be to leave when the time comes.

So tonight, when he comes over, you won't let your cheeks heat up under his gaze, you will completely act normal, won't send him flirty winks, you will keep your hands to yourself (and legs under your chair, because they like to caress Shinichiro's under the table). And if he doesn't get the hint, and climbs up to your window (self note: don't grin like an idiot, because it's totally romantic when he does that, don't run into his arms when he smirks in that charming way which makes your knees go weak, and more importantly: do. not. kiss. him.!), you will tell him that you appreciate what he had done for you, and tell him goodbye.

That's it.

Easy.

'Yeah, just like it was easy avoiding him after you confessed you were still a virgin and wanted him to dick you.' a taunting voice in your head said, making you groan out loud.

"I'll never be over him..." you said as you looked at yourself in the mirror and smoothed your hands down on your dress.  "But I can't let him know that."

He put the bar really high for other men, and you were afraid you'll never find someone who can reach your expectations.

But that's part of why you're gonna travel the world, right? There's gotta be a country, where there are men like him, right?

When the doorbell rang, you decided your first destination is going to be France or Italy.

While you made your way to the stairs, you tried to think of other ways that could make you fall out of him more easily. Maybe you should focus on his flaws, instead of the things that make him so appealing to you?

Yeah, okay, that should work.

As you walked down the stairs, you chanted the word in your head with each step you took.

'Flaws. Flaws. Flaws. Flaws."

The minute you reached the last step was at the same time your mom opened the door, and to your utmost surprise, Shinichiro was holding two yellow roses in his hands, holding one of them out for your mom.

"Aww, Shinichiro you're so sweet!" your mom exclaimed, and took the flower from his hand, giving him a quick kiss on his cheek, while she yelled for Niko questioning, why he never buys his girlfriend flowers.

When Shinichiro saw that they were talking in the kitchen, he stepped in front of you with his damn charming smile and held the other rose out for you.

You bit your lip, to keep yourself from smiling and took it from his hand.

"Thank you." you said as you looked at it, and held it close to your face to smell it.

'Shit, that's not going according to plan!' your mind screamed while you felt as your cheeks grew hot.

Shinichiro leaned closer to you and took a lock of your hair between his fingers, twirling it, while he looked at your face in adoration.

"Wanted to buy you something that represents beauty, but I stopped searching after I couldn't find anything that can be compared to yours."

Your eyes snapped up to his, your mouth slighty dropping open at his words.

'Should I say, I didn't know I wanted babies until now? No! Flaws, remember?'

You blinked under his intense gaze and cleared your throat.

"Pity I don't like yellow." you said with an apologetic smile and you turned sideways, going for the kitchen too.

'Liar, he could've bought you a black rose, your ovaries would've exploded so hard, it could've been heard in China!'

Shinichiro blinked in surprise, and watched as you walked away, but smirked when he saw that you tilted your head again to smell your gift.