Scaring tribes || ST 1

7

Archer's POV

A few days later...

I haven't talked to Dean since sunday, it's now wednesday and I have had the worst 3 days of my life. Every night I have dreamt these horrible nightmares that I don't even know how to or want to describe. I have woken up, shaking in the middle of the night every night. And let's just say that is not anything like me.

I can't sleep, I can't eat, I can't do anything, except think about my feelings. These feelings that I don't understand. Feelings that I don't have a clue what they mean.

So, for the last 3 days I have just been sitting here, on my bed, staring at the wall.

Suddenly the door opens and in comes my dad. He just stands there and looks at me, but I don't react. I just keep staring at that damn wall. I'm pretty sure I know were every atom in that wall is placed at this point.

"Well, Archer? What is this?" He said and looked down at my shirtless upper half of my body. And then, something inside me clicked. I look up at my dad and meet his gaze.

"I think you know." I said angrily and stood up. I walked over to him and punched him right in the face with my fist. He fell over onto his knees and I picked up my phone before I walked out of my room.

I ran down the stairs, grabbed my shoes and walked outside. I shoved my phone into my jeans pocket and put on my shoes. Then I started walking, just walking anywhere. Nowhere. Somewhere.

My emotions were rushing back to me again and I felt the tears burning behind my eyelids. It didn't matter how much I wanted to cry right this second, I'm not going to cry. I just won't.

All these thoughts of the weekend and from sunday and of Dean...

And then it hit me...

I finally understood. All these feelings about Dean. Shit, I'm fucking falling for him.

How did I not notice? But ofcourse, what do I really know about myself? All this time, my dad has been telling me exactly how to live my life and what I'm allowed to do and not. He always said that being gay was one of the biggest sins you could ever commit. So, I never questioned my sexuality, for me it was a must to be straight. But you know what, I don't give a fuck anymore. If I wanna be with Dean, then I'm gonna be with Dean.

I turned right, down a road towards Dean's house, I need to see him, right now.

I kept walking and walking until Dean's house came into view. I stopped and picked up my phone. It was 6.14 PM so he should be home by now. I started walking again and walked up to the door. My heart speed up and I needed to take a deep breath. My eyes closed and I took a deep breath. Then I knocked on the door.

I heard someone inside move towards the door. And then I knew that it was him, I felt his scent before he even opened the door. All of a sudden I felt a little relieved. And then the door opened.

Dean gasped when he saw that it was me. I must look like a total freak. Messy hair, tired face, no shirt and a worn out pair of jeans. He looked me up and down as I stared straight at him with my hands in my pockets. He blushed and gave me a painful smile. It hurted to see him this way. I looked down at the ground before walking closer to him. I looked up at him as I left a few feet between us.

"Hi, uhm. First of all, I'm so sorry for walking out on you like that. But because of how I was raised and my lifestyle, I kind of freaked out over what I felt in that moment." I started and my body started to relax a little. "Dean, omg... I don't know how I'm gonna say this. But uhm... I'm feeling things for you that I shouldn't be feeling, because of who I am. But I don't care anymore. I don't care about my father or about my tribes stupid rules."