Stop Running Away

Chapter 4

  I was in a resistant mood before we left for Matt's house. I know I had agreed to Caitlyn that I would go to Matt's with her for Christmas. But somehow, right now, today, on Christmas Eve, I rather am alone. I guess I am resistant because I resist knowing new people, especially guys. The idea of meeting new guys actually set me back. It makes me nervous.

Caitlyn insisted I go. And her exact words were " There is no way you stay at our apartment alone tonight."Although I tried so hard to explain to her that Christmas had no meaning to me, she just started to undress her burgundy down-jacket and dived directly into the couch. She simply told me if I won't go, then she won't go, without even bothering to flip her eyelids.

What can I say? Should I be proud of Caitlyn since she clearly knows my pain point? She knows that I could never be that resolute to let her spend Christmas in our small apartment. She knows I love her.

So here I am, shopping with Caitlyn in Whole Foods near Matt's house. We are trying to buy some decent gifts for Matt's Christmas invitation. Not surprisingly Matt is living in a pretty upscale neighborhood. A neighborhood I may never be able to afford.

I guess we arrived at Matt's early since I didn't see anyone else's car. Caitlyn kissed Matt on his cheek. I said hi to Matt and handed him the gift we picked.

I swear everything went pretty well until just now.

Now I see a young man driving a grey Ranger Rover towards us. Though his car is still twenty feet away from us, I immediately recognize the man in the driving seat is Oliver. I will not lie. I am flustered, a lot. Meanwhile, I turn myself around so he cannot see my face.

It has been almost two months since that contingent kiss, or a meaningless one to Oliver. But I cannot get it rid of my mind. I think about it all the time. Not in a way that I fall for Oliver at the first sight that I cannot forget about it, but more in a way like that kiss was the only good thing that happened to me with a man in four years.

My brain is shutting down, and my lips are becoming dry. Matt is greeting Oliver. Oliver's voice is nonchalant, just like that night. His voice is so close to my back and comes through my chest making me feel like being struck by lightning.

I know what will happen next so well. Oliver is about to meet the real Caitlyn, and then the fake Caitlyn, a.k.a. me. Running away would be an option. But to this point, it would be a shameless and ridiculous one.

Suddenly I realize running away has been my first choice all the time when bad things happen. And look what has gotten me as a consequence of keep running away. Guess what is gonna happen is gonna happen eventually.

So I make a deep sigh in my mind and turn back. There is a flash of shock in Oliver's gorgeous green eyes, but it is fleeting, replaced by a gleam of joy.

"This is Caitlyn, and this is Jiaqi." Matt introduces us to Oliver, "This is Oliver."

Oliver is clearly confused for a bit since Matt referred to me as Jiaqi and referred to Caitlyn apparently as Caitlyn. He soon understood everything. I much appreciate that Oliver did not expose my ludicrous lie. He just acted like he was meeting both of us for the first time.

"Oliver Parker," He nods to us and reaches his hand to me again. He stares at me undisguisedly.

I force myself to look him in the eye, gather my composure, and grip his hand, "Jiaqi Ling. You can call me Jiaqi." This time I can finally take a good look at his face. It turns out his hair looks more like ash brown than black in the sun.