before you love me | jjk

chapter thirty-five

**semi-important author's note at the end

━━━༻ ˚✩‧₊ june 2020₊‧✩˚༺━━━

Jinhyeong lay on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, looking at nothing in particular, hand clutching an empty soju bottle. He'd been like that for the past few hours, drinking and contemplating. He had drank slow, not too much to get drunk, but enough to take his mind off of things, but it seemed his efforts were futile. His mind was permanently fixated on what had happened a few weeks ago, the event on an endless replay in his head.

✩two weeks ago✩

Jinhyeong drummed his fingers on the steering as he waited for Narae to leave the dorm. It was around nine o'clock at night when he had received the call from Narae asking to meet up. She had told him her availability for the week, but he couldn't wait, and in his haste to see her, he had promptly suggested that they meet up that night instead. He needed to see her. He'd missed her too much.

They hadn't linked in some time, though they messaged and called each other occasionally, so he was eager to see her as soon as possible. Luckily though, she seemed just as enthusiastic as he had been, and readily agreed. She had suggested they drive to their beach spot, and though it was a bit odd, he decided not to dwell on it, and instead, grasp the opportunity presented to him.

Opening the passenger door, Jinhyeong's breath hitched in his throat as she climbed in. As usual, she was beautiful, her hair cascading over her shoulders in loose curls and her body clad in sweatpants and a hoodie. She leaned across the middle console to hug him, her hair tickling his face as her sweet scent filled the car.

"Long time no see angel." She said as she settled into her seat and clipped her seatbelt, the familiar nickname rolling off her tongue with ease.

"It really has been Rae." He said whilst reversing and manoeuvring his way  out of the compound.

The drive to the beach was filled with meaningless chatter, as the two caught up on what they had missed since they had last seen each other. Soon, they were there, making their way out of the car, grabbing a blanket on the way to sit on the soft sand under the light of the moon.

Jinhyeong noticed that Narae sat a little further from him than usual, but didn't comment on it, instead, he watched her sift her fingers through the sand. Now that he could focus on her fully, she seemed almost nervous.

It was silent around them, aside from the wind whistling through the air and the waves crashing against the shore. Suddenly, she blurted it out as if she couldn't hold the words in any longer, "I like someone."

Jinhyeong was quiet. She took that as a cue to carry on, not realising that it was the shock that coursed through him that rendered him incapable of speaking.

"I like someone. Like really really like them. And... and I want to pursue things with them for real."

Jinhyeong felt completely blindsided. He had no idea she was even seeing someone, it was the first he was hearing of her liking someone. Usually, if she was interested in someone he'd hear about it almost immediately, but for the first time, he was out of the loop.

He stared at her, eyes unblinking as he fought to keep his tone neutral, "Really, wow! I didn't even know you were dating again."

"I'm not! It sort of just... happened? There was nothing concrete to let you know about it before which is why I didn't say anything. I also didn't want to jinx things by talking too much about it. But today we kissed for the first time and I don't know..." Narae looked down shyly at her hands, almost as if she also couldn't believe the words coming out of her mouth, "It felt like everything shifted and it was suddenly so clear to me. I just knew then that I wanted to be with him."