Knight Syndrome

Ren

Ren stared at the blank page of his sketchbook, pencil hovering above the paper. Six months. That's how long it had been since Gorya and Thyme went public, since Ren realized he was the only one still waiting for something to happen.
Ren was happy for them, for Kavin and Kaning too. With MJ off to London, he was left to ponder about his life outside the F4.The pen remained motionless. No hope. No inspiration. Just the weight of being left behind. He pressed harder; the nib snapped. The last complete drawing was from six months ago, the F4 together, all of them smiling. He turned to a blank page. The white space stretched before him, vast and empty. He refused to repeat the same strokes again, something has to change, just one variable, for his future to change. Forever...
He had enrolled himself in university for a business program, not that he needed one, just what others his age did. Another day, another distraction. The lectures blurred together, faces in the classroom that meant nothing but polite nods. He moved through each day counting time, present but not really there, surrounded by people whose lives would never intersect with his in any meaningful way.
F4. A group of handsome and talented people popular in town. It sounded like something from a popular drama—cliché, perhaps. But the truth was, fiction was just a magnification of the real world. If social circles could exist, so could cliques.
Cliques existed, so did clichés. And he was trapped in both.
F4 would occasionally hang out together, but he knew he couldn't linger. They were family-like friends, but the page had to be turned.
"Here we go," Gorya entered with a bunch of pamphlets from public universities.
Ren watched her, the familiar warmth of her presence washing over him. But even Gorya felt distant now, like watching a scene from someone else's life.
"Thyme said he will apply wherever I do. Why is he going to college though, I don't understand."
It was for her, to be a part of her life journey. Gorya knew it too but she wasn't still used to Thyme's antics. Ren heard the words, registered them, but they seemed to float past him. Her life was moving forward, tethered to Thyme's orbit.
"Typical Thyme," Ren smiled as he browsed each of them. How many times had he worn this expression?
"What do you want to major in? Have you thought about it?" he asked her with the Ren-like smile, pure and unreadable. The question came out smoothly, but inside, he was counting the seconds until this conversation would end, until he could return to the blank page.
"I would say agriculture, it is something I am used to. After my injury, I couldn't go back to basketball, so any sports-related major will only bring back those memories."
Ren bit back his tongue. He was still angry at Thyme for ruining Gorya's future. Of course, it wasn't his fault the anti-F4 decided to attack her but he couldn't help but blame Thyme. After all, Thyme's mistakes only hurt Gorya, anybody he had wronged in the past all came back at her when the only mistake she made was falling in love with Thyme.
Gorya had noticed Ren's eyes shifting restlessly at her recollection of a painful incident.
"Maybe I should go to your university. Can you get me some contact in the event management degree at the University for the Creative Arts ?"
Ren nodded as he picked up his sketchbook and started another page.