Escape is Only Temporary [boyxboy]

Chapter XXXIV

 ~Friday 5th August 2016~

"Dad? You need to get up," Reece grumbled half a response at his youngest son, his brows drawing down further. He had barely slept the previous night, only settling, in the end, when Kai provided him with a sedative. At least that kept the nightmares at bay. Was there really any point in getting out of bed? Reece would spend the day drinking, and then cry himself to sleep once again. Why not cut out the middleman and just keep himself sedated instead? It was better than risking some drunken outburst.

"Dad, please, will you just get up? Marina's here, she wants to meet with you," Snowden was persistent, crouching beside the bed, forcing Reece to either meet his eye or risk waking Kai when he rolled over. Reece couldn't sleep alone, even sedated. Despite his nest slowly losing that rich scent of sandalwood that reminded him of his mate, he couldn't bear to be in it alone. It was better when his pups were there, soothing him whilst he slept, staving off what nightmares might make it past the dreamcatchers strung up around the room.

Snowden was always the first to wake out of the three, disappearing silently from the bedroom to make breakfast or check on Ariadna, then letting Mischief out to get some fresh air. Of course, Ariadna couldn't enter Reece's bedroom, her scent didn't match that of his mate and blood. It would make the alpha feral. Instead, she slept alone, in Snowden's bedroom. It was the same with Beau, who had finally settled his issues with Kai. Reece was happy for his pup, although he had still yet to apologise to Beau. And no intention either.

"Come on, you still need to shower first. You shouldn't keep her waiting," Cameron had the bright idea to call in another warlock that she knew of nearby. Marina wasn't bound to another pack, nor did she have any intention to follow that path, so she was the perfect woman for the job. And she was obsidian too, which put Reece at ease. She would be staying with the pack as a precaution until Shepherd was returned, however, it was only the other warlock that she would be concerned with. Reece couldn't trust her enough to allow her anywhere near the other wolves in his pack, she was only to heal Shepherd when he was found. After that, she would leave.

"OK," the mornings were the hardest. Each time the sun streamed in through the half-open curtains, Reece expected to see it shimmer off the obsidian skin of his lover. He waited to hear the slow breaths of Shepherd beside him, yearning for the quiet ramblings to grace his ears, yet, it was silent instead. For a fleeting moment, he could pretend that Shepherd was safe, curled up in bed beside him, or already making breakfast in the kitchen. Unfortunately, it never lasted.

Finally, Reece sat up. The movement was slow not only to prevent disturbing Kai but also due to the aching throb currently pulsing through Reece's head. Snowden's smile was worth it. A son proud of his own father for something so simple. It was pitiful. Reece was damn pitiful. Leaving Kai in bed, Reece slumped into the ensuite, completely aware that Snowden would be choosing his clothing for that day. He was capable, of course, it was just difficult. When Reece wanted nothing more than to curl up and sob, his daily outfit wasn't something that he actively gave much thought to.

Reece had mastered the ability to avoid his reflection in the mirror. He didn't want to see himself, didn't want to catch sight of the disgrace he had become. Alpha of the Greymoore pack, descendant of a line of pure black wolves, he was destined for greatness. And, instead, he was a drunk being cared for by his own pups. It was pathetic. He was pathetic. No matter what Snowden and Kai told him, no matter how many others assured him that he was coping as expected, he knew that wasn't the reality. He had turned to alcohol. In times of strife, of gut-wrenching agony, he had run back to the drink. He was his damn father.

A heavy sigh tumbled over Reece's lips when he stepped into the shower, the freezing water barely even fazing him as it beat down onto his aching muscles. Sometimes, a cold shower was good for the soul. It could be refreshing, even enjoyable, however, Reece wasn't feeling the positives that morning. He wasn't feeling anything, that was the problem. He was numb. Pain was the only thing reminding him that he was more than a walking corpse. And, even then, the cold was preventing that too.