It doesn't matter why I'm here,
why my heart is crushing
and my head is light.
It doesn't matter that I was hooked on a combination of dopamine and norepinephrine
and that my heart leapt and beat in every moment hilled with heat
and a sense of fake passion.
It doesn't matter that I was played like that song you just cant get out of your head
but annoys the hell out of you anyways,
and it definitely doesn't matter that we were more one sided than a masterpiece hanging on the gallery wall
for everyone else to see.
It still doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter why I'm here,
why my heart is empty
and my head is full.
It doesn't matter that I was hooked on the idea that we'd be together until the sun collapsed
and the earth went black
and there was darkness again.
It doesn't matter that you play like that song I just cant get out of my head
even though I'm finally out of yours
and it annoys the hell out of me.
And I still think about the faded scars and the long sleeve shirts,
the glazed eyes and crooked smiles,
and I think to myself all too often that every stitch in our veins was just another aid to our unraveling.
YOU ARE READING
Half English / Half Cynicism
Poetrythis is a collection of my original poetry, and I hope you enjoy. I explore the themes of belonging, LGBTQ+, longing, and loss. Thank you for giving my writing a read and a chance :).
