Just A Friend | Dnf

chapter three: i dreamed a dream

TW (check ongoing list of trigger warnings and content warnings in the story description. warnings are updated as chapters progress)

Today I will be productive for the whole day. I told myself.

I hadn't worked on anything in almost a week: hadn't streamed, hadn't been in a single MCC since they started back up again, and I had also kind of been ignoring my friends. Not on purpose, but I shut myself off from them without knowing. I'd usually be aware of when I did this, but this time I didn't realize it had been nearly nine days since I spoke to Bad, and six since I agreed to film with Quackity, but put it off for several more days.

So I set up my laptop on my desk with everything I needed to edit the video I recorded a few weeks ago. I began editing, having to stop a few times to get my laughter out because George and Sapnap arguing was hilarious to me. George always did these high-pitched screams that cracked me up.

I spent a good few hours doing that, then I decided to see if it was nice enough to sit outside. It was about eighty degrees and super sunny in good 'ole Florida this morning. I pulled out one of the lawn chairs beside the pool in my backyard and laid down on it. The sun was so warm and relaxing.

It always felt nice to go outside for a bit. Normally I'd try to avoid going outside, but lately I strived to get at least a half hour of fresh air a day.

I have to say, at the very least, I'm getting tanner and it seems to improve my mental health, I guess. I can work for longer periods of time, I don't get bunt out as easily, and I just feel happier.

I guess when they say you should go outside and touch some grass, they really are saying it as a helpful piece of advice...That's not actually what they mean, but that's how I choose to interpret it.

___

"I can't, Dream. I just don't feel the same way. I'm sorry." George said, almost tearing up as he looked me in the eyes.

I could tell it pained him to say that- pained him to hurt me in the way he just did.

My heart sank to my stomach. That was the last thing I was expecting him to say.

I don't want to ruin our friendship with my stupid fucking feelings. I can't. George means too much to me. I won't let that happen.

"No, no- it can't end like this. You said you felt something, you told me....you told me..." I said, my speech trailing off as I was trying to remember George's exact wording from a few days, when he confessed he had feelings too.

But I was now fearing that he told me he liked me just to make things less awkward: just to avoid having to have that confrontational conversation with me.

I began pacing around the living room as George sat and watched me- he was motionless on the couch.

"We can't ruin our friendship, Dream. I was drunk when you told me you liked me in that way, I just told you I feel the same cuz, well...I dunno, I really thought you were just joking. You run through that bit so often, I figured you weren't being serious." George said, standing up to touch my arm in attempt to comfort me.

I pulled my arm back before he could touch me, walking quickly into the kitchen to physically distance myself from him.

"I...I don't even know what to say right now." I said to George, peering at him from across the room. "I think I need to go lay down and just be by myself for a little while."