IRIS | MARK SLOAN

the game of life (4.)

I'd been feeling horrendous all week, so I wasn't really surprised when I found myself taking a pregnancy test in the women's bathroom, ten minutes before my next surgery. My period was even late, and Mark and I used protection. Fuck, we were basically a condom ad, but I was unnecessarily worried about it. My hypothetical baby.

I suppose the idea of children always scared me horribly. My upbringing was shitty enough, I couldn't trust myself enough to not screw up a kid as much as I screwed up myself. Mark and I weren't even married, and although I wasn't raised religious, I feel like it would be a lot less stress to have a kid once your married. You're fully and legally in love, and it's harder for them to run away. I didn't need to worry anyway because the test couldn't be more negative. All three of them, all stating in clear letters or symbols that there was not an embryo anywhere near my uterus, and for that I was glad.

Life is easier without babies.

I trashed all of the tests and headed to OR 2 for my scheduled C-Section with a patient I'd known for nearly all my time being a surgeon, Rosa. I met her as intern when she was first trying to get pregnant, I held her in my arms when she lost her first baby as a senior resident, I helped her deliver her first baby boy when I was a fellow, and now I was helping her deliver her first daughter as Head of Department.

She'd chosen a scheduled C-Section after complications with her son, after my superior at the time had to complete surgery on her newborn, something we call biliary atresia. All her pregnancies were going to be high risk, she had PCOS and was told for years she would never have kids, and yet here we are. Her husband Warren was the sweetest man I'd ever met, and he supported her and treated her like princess every step of the way.

I finishing scrubbing my hands and walked in.
"Rosa, how are we feeling today? Ready to have this baby?" I asked her, checking everything was laid out and ready for me to go in and operate.

"Feeling amazing. I can't wait for her to be here. Her name is Fleur by the way. Fleur Allen Beatriz." Rosa replied cheerfully, her smile spreading.

I had a NICU team on standby, and I called a midwife from the L&D floor for support for baby girl if she got into any difficulties after birth.

"Warren, now would be a good time to grab her hand and give her those reassuring words I know you love sharing." I laughed, watching him immediately do what I said, whispering affirmations into his wife's ear. She smiled up at him contently.

Time flew by, and all I had left was one more cut and baby girl was here. She came out screaming and healthy, weighing 7.7Ibs and whole lot in personality and attitude. She screamed the entire OR down, I'm pretty sure everyone could hear it. She had gastroschisis, it was clear to see since her stomach and intestines were poking out of a hole in her lower abdomen and onto the table.

As I was sewing Rosa up, the midwife urged me over to baby girl. I handed over the sutures and rushed over to her. This wasn't good. I needed to perform a surgery to put them back inside.

"Dr Slade, get Mrs Beatriz sewn up and moved out of the OR please. I need this OR converted for emergency pediatric surgery, stat." I demanded.

"What's wrong with my baby? What happened to my baby?" Rosa screamed, hysterical now.

"Rosa, she had gastroschisis. Her digestive organs are outside of her body and I need to place them back inside. I have done this many times before and I will do I can for your baby." I reassured her.