Motivated to be lazy

SS Public Humiliation

Oh father, thank you so much. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. Words can not do any justice to how much gratitude I feel for my dear father on this day, at this moment.

This is what he meant that I would thank him later. This school is incredible. The competition, the cut throat nature, the sheer ruthlessness. It was as though my grandfather who served as the previous chairman of the school, saw my birth coming and molded this school to directly cater for me once I became of age.

At the time, I cursed my fathers name. I was lonely, I missed Kiyotaka and I saw him less and less as the month rolled by. I wanted to be in his class, his presence is soothing to me. He was my one constant in life. While father was away on business all the time, I could always count on Kiyotaka to be there by my side. Then just like that, he was taken away from me. I was forced to live alone despite the fact that my classmates helped me. Now I couldn't be more elated.

I'm very rarely surprised, while I get happy and sad just like any other person, very little tends to excite me. It's the curse of being a genius, when you rarely lose to competition there's nothing to fear. After all, it's like gambling when you know the chips are worthless. When you have no proverbial skin in the game, it all seems meaningless. It's why life is such a beautiful thing, eventually it has to end.

So when Mashima-sensei told us about the existence of the S-System and the details of what it meant I was absolutely elated. In a body cursed with a lack of physical ability, the only thing that I could compete with was my mind. In this school, I could lead this class to victory. Whether they liked it or not, I would drag them to the summit. I would ruthlessly cut down anyone who stood in my way friend or foe, any who opposed me would be thoroughly destroyed.

I wouldn't do it for any of my classmates. If anything it would be great if they put up a fight against my rule. It would be biblical. It would be absolutely wonderful to see the fight drain from their souls when they realized the helplessness of opposing me. It would be even better if they hated me. Watching them begrudgingly follow my orders, cursing me as they did my bidding would be so invigorating. Making them fight against their nature simply for their own self-interest, is there anything better?

But most importantly, it would be another way to compete against him. Six years. Five long years of battling him in the arena of chess and not a single victory. It was the only thing I had in life where I was the underdog, it was why I craved the competition so much. As mentioned previously, a game is tedious when there isn't a risk of losing and I loved the thrill of chasing my first victory. But my brother had been masterfully dodging any form of competition with me ever since that ignoramus let me win that one time.

Now he had no choice. He would be forced to do battle with me, the arena being completely different. Perhaps this time, I could taste that sweet nectar of victory just once. To experience the high of finally being triumphant over him would be the validation to my existence. It would substantiate that I was worthy of the title of genius. I would be able to stand proudly next to him.

I have never minced words when bragging about his greatness. Whenever I was asked to expound on how great he was I would simply smirk.

"You'll see eventually," I would always say whenever the topic came up.

As time passed, I didn't need to elaborate anymore. They saw what I saw in him. He was popular. I wasn't angry when I saw the videos and photos that were taken of him while he worked out in the gym. On the contrary, I was proud.

It was probably pretentious of me that I felt validated whenever I would hear girls whispering amongst themselves about how handsome he was, about how strong he was. It made me feel incredibly satisfied when they would come to me and ask what he was like, if he had a girlfriend or what he was like as a person. I would willingly sing his praises while completely avoiding his one biggest flaw. It would soon come to be my biggest regret for the first month of my high school career.